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The Official Man Utd & Liverpool plus Chelsea, Everton and City Banter Thread!

Discussion in 'Manchester United' started by UIR - Kagawa Powa, Jul 21, 2011.

  1. Noblelox

    Noblelox Well-Known Member

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    Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days.
    Eventually, Michael the archangel found him on the seventh day, resting.
    He inquired of God, "Where have you been?"

    God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds "Look Michael, look what I've made." Said God

    Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

    "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."

    "Balance?" enquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth, "For example, North America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while South America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hotspot and Russia will be a cold spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people,"

    God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."

    The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a small area of land and said, "What's that?"

    "Ah," said God. "That's Liverpool, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful people; great football teams, two impressive cathedrals and home to a number of the worlds greatest ever pop groups. The people from Liverpool are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace."

    Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there would be BALANCE!"

    God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the ****ers I'm putting next to them in Manchester."
     
    #19741
  2. Constcrepe

    Constcrepe Active Member

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    i hear KD has put these posters all over Melwood and Anfield.

    please log in to view this image
     
    #19742
  3. HRH Custard VC

    HRH Custard VC National Car Park Attendant

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    Where are all the Liverpool posters today?
     
    #19743
  4. KingEric07.

    KingEric07. cape wearing twat

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    Probably hung over from celebrating their kit deal <ok>
     
    #19744
  5. Constcrepe

    Constcrepe Active Member

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    Lol.
     
    #19745
  6. Culty Legends

    Culty Legends New Member

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    lmao
     
    #19746
  7. Skylarker

    Skylarker PL High Commissioner

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    Probably busy working you jobless sweaty Manc <ok>
     
    #19747
  8. HRH Custard VC

    HRH Custard VC National Car Park Attendant

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    Stealing is not a job :emoticon-0116-evilg
     
    #19748
  9. Depay Sound

    Depay Sound Well-Known Member

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    Look at Liverpool's lineup for tonight. It's ****ing awful <laugh>
     
    #19749
  10. BringBackfootie

    BringBackfootie New Member

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    Berb ye skank, tuned in for the game? got your LFC yfronts on?
     
    #19750

  11. BringBackfootie

    BringBackfootie New Member

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    Excuse me pickpocket is a noble profession
     
    #19751
  12. Swarbs

    Swarbs Well-Known Member
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    I believe the politically correct term is "fingersmith" <ok>

    Although to be fair eatcustard has forgotten the people in Liverpool who get paid millions to work very hard at smiling in their training ground.
     
    #19752
  13. Sweats

    Sweats Sure
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    <laugh> .
     
    #19753
  14. One of the lads

    One of the lads Well-Known Member

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    Collecting your giro can't really be classified as working.
     
    #19754
  15. HRH Custard VC

    HRH Custard VC National Car Park Attendant

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    Do scousers still have silly permed hair and wear shell suits?
     
    #19755
  16. BringBackfootie

    BringBackfootie New Member

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    get with the times man, its mullets hotpants and checked shirts with the slieves ripped off at the shoulder<ok>
     
    #19756
  17. BringBackfootie

    BringBackfootie New Member

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    Suarez couldn't finish a crossword if the last line was 4 across 'uruguayan formerly of Ajax plaing for Liverpool FC'
     
    #19757
  18. Swarbs

    Swarbs Well-Known Member
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    Is the answer "negrito"? :emoticon-0103-cool:
     
    #19758
  19. To be fair, I wouldn't get that either, simply because I don't know what 'plaing' means...<whistle>
     
    #19759
  20. Swarbs

    Swarbs Well-Known Member
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    I think it's Irish for "missing the goal from six yards"
     
    #19760

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