The Official Man Utd & Liverpool plus Chelsea, Everton and City Banter Thread!
- Thread starter UIR - Kagawa Powa
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thats bollocks... you have clearly never been to an england test where everyone is hammered and in fancy dress... or to a local 20/20 where again everyone is trashed an singing...
Just to change the subject: latest news from SAF
Rooney like Pele, but with prostitutes, says Ferguson
WAYNE Rooney is a white, prostitute-loving version of Pele, Sir Alex Ferguson has claimed.
Rooney likes to be carried round the hotel room by four naked women with artificial breasts
The Manchester United manager said his star striker had the pace, energy and aggression of the Brazilian legend, especially when he was pumping skanks in a four-star hotel near the M6.
Ferguson added: "When Pele tried that outrageous shot from the halfway line I'm reminded of how Wayne likes to stand on a chair in the corner of the hotel room and then try and land on a prostitute that's at least six feet away.
"And the daring and imagination of Pele dummying the Uruguayan keeper in the '70 World Cup is like Wayne when he puts on his brilliant Geordie accent and books an executive suite under the name of 'Roon Wayney'."
Experts are now poring over old videos of the great Brazilian just to double check whether or not Sir Alex is finally slipping into stage one dementia or whether he has been taking the wrong pills again.
Footballologist Julian Cook said: "The easiest way to work out if Wayne Rooney is as good as Pele is to watch footage of both of them and then not be completely idiotic."
Ferguson added: "Also, I love that bit in Escape to Victory where Michael Caine is showing the tactics on a blackboard and Pele takes the chalk and says 'I do this, this, this, this - goal'. It makes me think of Wayne, wandering into the bar of a Ramada Inn, eyeing-up the orange-skinned trollops and saying 'I do that one, that one, that one, that one - three hundred quid'.
"And just as Pele is a man of grace and intelligence and a wonderful ambassador for both football and his country, Wayne spent ninety grand on a Range Rover and likes to blow his muck up tarts."
GKRK
Rooney like Pele, but with prostitutes, says Ferguson
WAYNE Rooney is a white, prostitute-loving version of Pele, Sir Alex Ferguson has claimed.
Rooney likes to be carried round the hotel room by four naked women with artificial breasts
The Manchester United manager said his star striker had the pace, energy and aggression of the Brazilian legend, especially when he was pumping skanks in a four-star hotel near the M6.
Ferguson added: "When Pele tried that outrageous shot from the halfway line I'm reminded of how Wayne likes to stand on a chair in the corner of the hotel room and then try and land on a prostitute that's at least six feet away.
"And the daring and imagination of Pele dummying the Uruguayan keeper in the '70 World Cup is like Wayne when he puts on his brilliant Geordie accent and books an executive suite under the name of 'Roon Wayney'."
Experts are now poring over old videos of the great Brazilian just to double check whether or not Sir Alex is finally slipping into stage one dementia or whether he has been taking the wrong pills again.
Footballologist Julian Cook said: "The easiest way to work out if Wayne Rooney is as good as Pele is to watch footage of both of them and then not be completely idiotic."
Ferguson added: "Also, I love that bit in Escape to Victory where Michael Caine is showing the tactics on a blackboard and Pele takes the chalk and says 'I do this, this, this, this - goal'. It makes me think of Wayne, wandering into the bar of a Ramada Inn, eyeing-up the orange-skinned trollops and saying 'I do that one, that one, that one, that one - three hundred quid'.
"And just as Pele is a man of grace and intelligence and a wonderful ambassador for both football and his country, Wayne spent ninety grand on a Range Rover and likes to blow his muck up tarts."
GKRK
Yeah for posh twats
A twat I may be, but posh? No sky, your forensic brain has got that one bang wrong, as you'll discover when we go for a few ales in the 'Pool
Proper gay
To be fair I quite like cricket (to a certain extent). I don't make a plan to watch it, but i'll watch the odd couple of hours from time to time.
I'm more of a golf man myself.
Proper gay
To be fair I quite like cricket (to a certain extent). I don't make a plan to watch it, but i'll watch the odd couple of hours from time to time.
I'm more of a golf man myself.
Southern ponce
i like playing golf, only time i will watch it is for the masters an the open.....
I'm not that interested in county cricket.. I used to go alot about 5 years ago but got banned from the ground an had to hand my executive members card back to the company for the season an never went back
I'm not that interested in county cricket.. I used to go alot about 5 years ago but got banned from the ground an had to hand my executive members card back to the company for the season an never went back
Golf is the single biggest addiction I've ever had in my like.
After alcohol of course but that doesn't count really.
After alcohol of course but that doesn't count really.
What are you, a sport whore? I thought test cricket was the love of your life. 354 for 6 at lunch.
think how embarrassed you will be if I were to beat you at golf later... highly unlikely..
people that say that are either s h i t at it or have never tried playing the game..
Not that unlikely, that's what handicaps are for. If I play off scratch and you 18 then that's a fair chance.
It should come with a warning label...Highly addictive.
I'm **** at it but play most weeks and absolutely love it
