Off Topic World Cup Thread

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There's a good chance that one or more Spurs players will be world cup winners. I hope this doesn't affect squad cohesion - particularly if Spurs players are playing each other in the final!
 
Ladbrokes have closed betting on next year's race, after rumours of a new entrant was received from Brazil ....... <laugh>

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Belgium/Brazil summary
* Been a while since I remembered to do one of these...
* Neymar's on the floor already
* Here's one for the commentators banging on about decades-old Brazil teams as per usual: neither the 1970 nor 1982 Brazil teams scored an own goal...
* Neymar's on the floor again
* While you might think it due to their players' victim complex, Brazil's national anthem is not entitled Você Nunca Andará Sozinho
* Neymar's on the floor again
* Meanwhile, at the other end of the pitch, the ball's in the back of the Brazilian net again
* Kompany was lucky to not concede a penalty on the brink of half time. While he did make contact with Gabriel Jesus, and somebody actually fouling a Brazil player to make them fall over is a rare sight in this tournament, the ball was going out. Luckily, Belgium are wearing the red shirts, so even Mark Clusterfuck would've thought twice about giving it...
* What is Lukaku's role in this team, exactly? To keep the opponents in the game by wasting chances and buildup play every single time he gets the ball?
* Bloody hell. Paulinho has an open goal after Courtois parries the ball, and he manages to tamely sidefoot the ball two yards to his right - which is ninety degrees away from the goal
* Neymar's on the floor again
* Chadli is actually helping out with the defensive dirty work? He never bothered with that for us, which is why we sold him to West Brom...where he never bothered with it either, but for some reason he bothers for the national team. Whoever signs him on impulse this summer will learn their mistake soon enough
* Kompany doesn't bother trying to clear an incoming set piece, allowing Renato Augusto a free header to make it 2-1
* Hazard sets up De Bruyne on the edge of the area, but De Bruyne appears to have not expected Hazard to pass and looks surprised as the ball bounces off him and is snaffled by the Brazilian defence
* A couple of minutes later and De Bruyne sets up Hazard on the edge of the area, but Hazard appears to...you can guess the rest
* Neymar's on the floor again
* It's obvious that Belgium need a player to hold the ball in midfield for the last fifteen minutes, but with Dembele nailed to the bench and Zhothaqquah left at home (and subsequently retiring from international football as a result) instead Fellaini and Witsel are aimlessly hoofing it to Brazil's back four
* So with Belgium needing to hold onto the ball, Martinez subs Chadli for Vermaelen. That's going to ease the pressure on the back four, isn't it?
* Neymar's on the floor again
* So now Martinez is bringing on Tielemans to keep hold of the ball...but subs Lukaku to bring him on and leaves Hazard up front, so there's nobody to hold onto the ball up front
* For ****'s sake, has nobody told Witsel that aimlessly hoofing the ball in the general direction of Lukaku wasn't working, so aimlessly hoofing in Hazard's general direction is doing nothing but pissing off his teammates as they're the ones who have to deal with another Brazilian attack approximately four seconds later?
* Neymar's on the floor again, but it's because the final whistle blown and he's upset. Oh no, what a personal disaster...
 
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humanbeingincroydon said:
Belgium/Brazil summary
* Been a while since I remembered to do one of these...
* Neymar's on the floor already
* Here's one for the commentators banging on about decades-old Brazil teams as per usual: neither the 1970 nor 1982 Brazil teams scored an own goal...
* Neymar's on the floor again
* While you might think it due to their players' victim complex, Brazil's national anthem is not entitled Você Nunca Andará Sozinho
* Neymar's on the floor again
* Meanwhile, at the other end of the pitch, the ball's in the back of the Brazilian net again
* Kompany was lucky to not concede a penalty on the brink of half time. While he did make contact with Gabriel Jesus, and somebody actually fouling a Brazil player to make them fall over is a rare sight in this tournament, the ball was going out. Luckily, Belgium are wearing the red shirts, so even Mark Clusterfuck would've thought twice about giving it...
* What is Lukaku's role in this team, exactly? To keep the opponents in the game by wasting chances and buildup play every single time he gets the ball?
* Bloody hell. Paulinho has an open goal after Courtois parries the ball, and he manages to tamely sidefoot the ball two yards to his right - which is ninety degrees away from the goal
* Neymar's on the floor again
* Chadli is actually helping out with the defensive dirty work? He never bothered with that for us, which is why we sold him to West Brom...where he never bothered with it either, but for some reason he bothers for the national team. Whoever signs him on impulse this summer will learn their mistake soon enough
* Kompany doesn't bother trying to clear an incoming set piece, allowing Renato Augusto a free header to make it 2-1
* Hazard sets up De Bruyne on the edge of the area, but De Bruyne appears to have not expected Hazard to pass and looks surprised as the ball bounces off him and is snaffled by the Brazilian defence
* A couple of minutes later and De Bruyne sets up Hazard on the edge of the area, but Hazard appears to...you can guess the rest
* Neymar's on the floor again
* It's obvious that Belgium need a player to hold the ball in midfield for the last fifteen minutes, but with Dembele nailed to the bench and Zhothaqquah left at home (and subsequently retiring from international football as a result) instead Fellaini and Witsel are aimlessly hoofing it to Brazil's back four
* So with Belgium needing to hold onto the ball, Martinez subs Chadli for Vermaelen. That's going to ease the pressure on the back four, isn't it?
* Neymar's on the floor again
* So now Martinez is bringing on Tielemans to keep hold of the ball...but subs Lukaku to bring him on and leaves Hazard up front, so there's nobody to hold onto the ball up front
* For ****'s sake, has nobody told Witsel that aimlessly hoofing the ball in the general direction of Lukaku wasn't working, so aimlessly hoofing in Hazard's general direction is doing nothing but pissing off his teammates as they're the ones who have to deal with another Brazilian attack approximately four seconds later?
* Neymar's on the floor again, but it's because the final whistle blown and he's upset. Oh no, what a personal disaster...
Click to expand...
Excellent work, mate - although I would contest a couple of things: thought Lukaku (for all his timidity in front of goal) was really good and also (whispering it) Fellaini <yikes> Totally agree with the last 15 mins hoofing by him and Witsel, but otherwise he was a monster for Belgium last night. Credit where it’s due :emoticon-0148-yes:
But as you say - was crying out for Dembele in last 15-20 minutes....... <doh>
 
Spur of the Moment said:
Excellent work, mate - although I would contest a couple of things: thought Lukaku (for all his timidity in front of goal) was really good and also (whispering it) Fellaini <yikes> Totally agree with the last 15 mins hoofing by him and Witsel, but otherwise he was a monster for Belgium last night. Credit where it’s due :emoticon-0148-yes:
But as you say - was crying out for Dembele in last 15-20 minutes....... <doh>
Click to expand...
Honestly, all I remember from Lukaku was him wasting so much potential buildup with him miscontrolling the ball or dribbling down blind alleys, to the point I started to believe Benteke was on the pitch instead.
 
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humanbeingincroydon said:
Honestly, all I remember from Lukaku was him wasting so much potential buildup with him miscontrolling the ball or dribbling down blind alleys, to the point I started to believe Benteke was on the pitch instead.
Click to expand...
You definitely missed some better moments <laugh> - like setting up the 2nd goal.......
 
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