Off Topic General chat forum

There are better ones too. On my phone or I'd post them. ****ing brilliant, well worth watching

 

I remember this, can't believe it was over three years ago though.

Who is the 'user deleted' who started it, was it ST?

 

Beale. ST's still on there - think he's called cup face.

That thread was GC's finest hour without a doubt. We should try it with someone else.

 

They need to

 

I've just read the thread on general chat.

I have to say heroic from you @Matth_2014

More than held your own against the pond life.

Great few broadside from @Spurlock

They accused me of touching children not long ago.

Best to leave them be I reckon!

 

Just read some of the owners replies to the reviews. He's off his ****ing rocker. Brilliant.

Out of order though but ****ing funny!

 

King **** should post on there!

 

This is a particularly brilliant riposte by Paulo;

"Fortunately, working in the restaurant 6 full days per week at my family’s restaurant allows me to deal with and assess which customers have a genuine grievance and which customers are tragic freeloaders. You most certainly fell into the second category. I am the waiter you describe as clearing your main course plates. The truth of your narration ends here. I actually made a jovial comment about you not being able to finish off the remainder (just 3 pieces of penne pasta) of your dish. At that point I was not aware of the strange nature of your disposition, otherwise I would have avoided interaction with you altogether. The response I got to my jovial comment was an odd glare, presumably due to the personality disorder you appear to suffer. You then advised me that your dish was bland and that the meat in your husband’s pasta dish was chewy. I was deadpan and made no shrug of my shoulders. You then asked to see the dessert menus and at that point you were clearly hoping I would give you some reassurance that I would give you free desserts or a free meal. I did not take you up on your invitation due to the following reasons:
1. You ate 99% of your pasta dish (only leaving 3 pieces of penne) and your husband ate all of the beef fillet in his pasta dish.
2. The ingredients for the penne al pollo dish you had are penne, tomato, cream, chicken breast pieces and garlic. The dish is only bland if one finds these ingredients bland. What other tastes can the dish possibly have? We offer parmesan and black pepper as a matter of course for those who wish for a more salty or peppery taste top their pasta/risotto.
3. The beef fillet I buy is of very high quality and comes from a trusted butcher who has been in business for 40+ years. Chewy fillet is not a problem we have ever encountered with this butcher. Never. Ever. Quite the opposite feedback is given by our customers, in fact.
4. Your husband ate all of the supposedly chewy beef fillet in his dish.
5. You waited until you had both consumed all you could of your main courses before putting into action your pitiful ruse despite the fact that there were 5 waiters on duty that evening who constantly walk around the dining floor serving customers and who could have dealt with you far sooner (i.e. before you had consumed 99% of your pasta dish and your husband had consumed 100% of the supposedly chewy beef fillet in his pasta dish).
6. As you were speaking and pulling your bizarre facial expressions, your husband was shaking his head and smiling at me as if to hush you and reassure me that he did not agree with you.
Your review makes little sense (three stars for value and atmosphere, four stars for service and two stars for food yet overall one star and “terrible”) and reeks of revenge at me not taking any action on your observations or giving you free stuff. Additionally, your table sits directly under the specials boards. It is the only table to sit directly under the specials boards in the restaurant. It has the most optimum view of the specials boards. Am I being clear enough at just how peculiar your comments are about us not advising you of the specials boards? Finally, your anaemic chips: I did not see any chips on your table as I cleared off your plates. Oh that’s right, because you ate them all….
Please be assured I will be taking no action whatsoever as a result of your undesirable visit or review as none is required. We do not wish nor require the custom of abnormal scroungers."

Paolo Martone
Qua Italian Restaurant

 

Dan ****ing Starkey??

Where did you disappear to?

 

brilliant..

I read one about the waiter perving on a customer and he was raging. The reply was asking for descriptions so he could sack him

 

Walking tour of Scotland iirc.

 

DMD wouldn't give up to be fair.

 

He'd be in his element if they like talking about child abuse.

 

You not seen his videos Dev?

 

I have now and sadly I can't unsee them.

 

Yeah I should have read on

 

There's some ****ing corkers in there tbf

He has a whole thread on here full of them...fill ya boots

He's a good dancer too.

 

And he wonders why he doesn’t get his end away.

 

I'd feel guilty, he's clearly - as the Germans would say "missing a few cups from his schrank".