Off Topic The Sullivan & Gold Comedy Corner

  • Please bear with us on the new site integration and fixing any known bugs over the coming days. If you can not log in please try resetting your password and check your spam box. If you have tried these steps and are still struggling email [email protected] with your username/registered email address
  • Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!
Citizen Kane

Citizen Kane

Danny Rosebud
Jul 8, 2015
6,639
6,015
113
Saw a suggestion the other day in our Rival Watch thread that the sheer volume of comedic moments flowing from our favourite taxpayer burden should surely warrant its own thread. This, combined with the fact that Wet Sham have never been and will never be a true 'rival' is reason enough to pursue this as an excellent option. I am proud to be able to begin the excruciating process of reimbursing the public purse the £250m it was robbed of by inviting you all to gain from the therapeutic benefits of having a good chuckle at the shower of ****e teetering on the brink of their 3rd relegation in 15 years.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: The Changing Man and Spur of the Moment
To kick things off, here's an article that just came up:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/38595765

Surprise, surprise, Dimitri Payet 'no longer wants to play' for West Ham. But, being eminently sensible, the club would rather cling onto him and let him run down his contract, rather than sell him for a fortune this window.

<doh>

EDIT: There is a backlog of hilarious 'fails' for them this season, feel free to post any you particularly enjoyed.
 
  • Like
Reactions: NotSoMightyEastbourneBoro
It would be comedy if the whole situation with the Olympic Stadium wasn't so tragic. There's a fine line! It appears to have been a half billion pound face saving exercise by the "legacy committee".
 
I remember a thread back on Bbc606(I think or early days here) when it first came to light that they were getting the OS. We were posting things like 'how will the manager communicate with the players? With a gramophone. Or, 'do season tickets come with a pair of binoculars'

These boys have always been our play thing, great thread CK.
 
We're stuck with Payet,
Dimitri Payet,
We can't really understand,
We pay more than £100k,
He doesn't want to play,
We've got Dimitri Payet.

Okay, it's not Hal David but he isn't Zidane, is he?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Spur of the Moment
Them charging £55 for an FA Cup-only strip, only for the club to then discover that they had broken FA rules on advertising - something they would have known months ago if the club had ever asked - is worthy of this gif...

You must log in or register to see images
 
  • Like
Reactions: Citizen Kane
Hideous creation it is too. Looks like the sort of thing you'd find at SportsDirect in the Jeremy Kyle section, buy 2 get one free sort of deal.

You must log in or register to see images
 
At the press conference to announce that Dimitri Payet is a cun...Sorry, at Slaven Bilic's press conference a journalist asked

:"If Payet doesn't play for West Ham again, how are the club going to fill the hole?"

Fair play to Bilic, who throughout the proceedings looked like he should be on suicide watch, he resisted the obvious temptation to respond:

"We'll probably give tickets away on TalkSPORT like we usually do."
 
  • Like
Reactions: Spur of the Moment and The Changing Man
I love this thread already - The Payet story has just made my day completely.

I make no secret of my absolute hatred of all things Spam and I just hope that come May we can enjoy the sight of them slipping into the bottom 3 and out of the prem.
 
The Changing Man said:
I love this thread already - The Payet story has just made my day completely.

I make no secret of my absolute hatred of all things Spam and I just hope that come May we can enjoy the sight of them slipping into the bottom 3 and out of the prem.
Click to expand...

We play them at the HMRC Arena on May 6th. Just imagine we relegate them in front of their own rent-a-crowd! The thought is almost too joyous to contain.
 
  • Like
Reactions: The Changing Man
"Thanks for that Brian" said:
At the press conference to announce that Dimitri Payet is a cun...Sorry, at Slaven Bilic's press conference a journalist asked

:"If Payet doesn't play for West Ham again, how are the club going to fill the hole?"

Fair play to Bilic, who throughout the proceedings looked like he should be on suicide watch, he resisted the obvious temptation to respond:

"We'll probably give tickets away on TalkSPORT like we usually do."
Click to expand...
This is one case where the player has my sympathy! :emoticon-0136-giggl
 
C. Kane said:
We play them at the HMRC Arena on May 6th. Just imagine we relegate them in front of their own rent-a-crowd! The thought is almost too joyous to contain.
Click to expand...

Will they still have to pay their 19/6d per annum rent for HMP (Her Majestys Pitch) Stratford or will it be reduced as they plummet though the leagues?
 
humanbeingincroydon said:
You must log in or register to see images
Click to expand...
You must log in or register to see media

Now I'm no fan of West Ham, obviously, but this channel almost makes me feel sorry for them.
The regulars seem like proper fans and the whole thing's obviously extremely painful for them.
They feel like they've lost their club, basically. The move's been a catastrophe, so far.
 
PleaseNotPoll said:
You must log in or register to see media

Now I'm no fan of West Ham, obviously, but this channel almost makes me feel sorry for them.
The regulars seem like proper fans and the whole thing's obviously extremely painful for them.
They feel like they've lost their club, basically. The move's been a catastrophe, so far.
Click to expand...
Don't worry, they'll erode that sympathy when they start their usual array of Auschwitz songs the next time we play them.
 
  • Like
Reactions: "Thanks for that Brian", Citizen Kane and PleaseNotPoll
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back