Ipswich Town New Player Just Signed

Breaking news from Portman Road is that we have just signed a new player called "Imminent". He has been linked with us for the last 3 years and Clegg has just confirmed that he will be the new signing that we have been linked with for ages. Clegg is delighted that we have finally got "Imminent" as it sends out a powerful message to the fans that Ipswich Town Football Club will be an Imminent force next season. The Ipswich Town supporters club on hearing the news welcomed the signing but were hoping that Clegg would have been signing "Immediate" today but apparantly that deal still has a long way to go!

Clegg switched to "Imminent" after he failed in his attempts to get "ironsinthefire" a few weeks ago as he couldn't agree terms with the player eventhough a fee had been agreed.

 

haha quite a funny article !

But I don't know what people expect - as Clegg isn't even in the country at the moment !

I think its a good time for Clegg to go away. He obviously knows very little will actually happen at the murrrrment ( lawrenson ! ) as the agents will be holding out for the best possible deal on players.

In 3 weeks time, all hell will break loose and clubs will be signing players all over the shop.

Anyone else out there think players demands may well be lower in the coming years ?
Take Jeremy Aliadiere for instance - without a club all year. Darius Vassell was without a club for a period of time also...!

 

Look at the squad we have.

We have got two months to the new season. Eight weeks. We need to sign approximately one quality player and one average player per fortnight between now and the new season just to get back to where we were at the end of last season!

On the plus side - no news on Jimmy Bullard is good news.

 

There are a number of others ready to follow "Imminent's" signature as I understand it from highly reliable local sources. These include; "Impending", "Looming", "Any moment now", "Really soon" "Dead cert" "Signing today" and "For sure he's coming". The other really good news here is that none of these players are Irish nor are they coming from Sunderland. Happy days!!!

 

Tractor Tim

No wonder Clegg looks flustered with all those "irons in the fire" looking at his facial expressions at times they've been shoved up his arse!

 

Problem being guys is that the likes of Imminent are apparently "in the pipeline". Now if we can find out where they are stuck, perhaps we could help.

 

i know his cousin "adamant".
He can stand and deliver.

 

"Imminent" isnt there an alternative spelling of that word? Ah yes I remember now I think it goes B*LL*CKS.

 

FM

I've never known such Bollocks! Our great club has been reduced to this!

I ****ing despair I really do!

 

You and me both boy! They surely dont think we are so gullible... Oh silly me of course they do!

 

Are we not allowed to type BOLLOCKS??

 

No Spanish we are definately not allowed to type the word BOLLOCKS.

 

Oh Bollocks, thats me in trouble then, sorry Lancs i promise i won't type the word Bollocks again. Thanks for pointing me in the right direction Fieldmarshall.

 

Anyway, what has happened to our mighty moderator? He has not been on here spouting the usual Bollocks of late!!

 

Spanish
Yorkie is busy getting his leg over!

Good lad he needs his oats!