Off Topic Heart breaking moment

^^^^^^ this tees

 

Been through two divorces Tees and I wouldn't wish just one on anyone mate. I have four kids and when you can't get to see them everyday of your life I must admit there was some dark days. However, time is a great healer and you will never lost the bond with your kids because they will love immensely. It doesn't matter what anyone says to them....your their dad and they will never forget it. You have to stay strong for them...yes, there will be a lot of personal sacrifice for you but this just comes with the territory. As much as you will worry about them....they will also worry about you. They need stability in their lives and will need you to be strong for them. Please don't do anything that would affect them for the rest of their lives. Just remember your their hero and just don't do anything stupid that you will regret later. Unless you have been through a break up with kids it's hard to understand the hurt that comes with this. You will be get and their will be some wonderful moments that you will share with your kids down the road....maybe even see Sunderland win one day with them. Hang in there and cross each bridge when you get there.....my thoughts are with you Tees.....

 

Thanks lads your words of encouragment and advice mean alot to me during this hard time.

 

Advice.

Never run off at the mouth about your Ex in front of the Boys. (I do know the temptation).

Always be there for them and make sure that they know that they can depend on you every time no matter what.
Whatever your visiting /care arrangement are, stick to them like glue.

Your boys will grow up.
Do the right things and in time you WILL be mates with them.
Look forward to the time that they will be buying you a pint.

Do it right and this will happen.

 

My boys already know how much they mean to me.
Ive practically done everything for them since they were babies and up until we finally sold our house last week and stopped living togeather. My ex likes being a mother but she doesnt like the duties that come with being a mother, her career is number 1 priority for her. I asked her last week when was the last time she took them to the park and she couldnt answer. I always have a little adventure planned for the 3 of us.

I was the one that took them to get weighed as babies, took them to mother and toddler groups and its me that planned and cooked every single meal for them aswell as making sure we always had the food in that we needed for them. I feel lost now that i can no longer do this for them permanant.

My ex wont know whats hit her now im not about anymore to wipe her arse for her and she knows it hence the fact shes more than happy with our joint custody agreement.

 

That one sentence says it all marra... Great days ahead for the 3 of you I'm sure

 

I

From what you say I wouldn't be shocked if you were asked to take them back with herself as the 'visitor'.

My divorce was a little unusual, (for 36 years ago), in that I got custody.

Since I had to work as well I can promise you that it is hard graft, and I only had an eight year old girl to worry about.

Lets just say that my social life became a little restricted, (virtually none existent), for many years.
To some extent my career had to take a back seat as well.

 

The moment your half asleep boy opens his eyes looks and you and says "Daddy i love you more than toys and chocolate".

My hearts breaking right now

 

I hope I have that kind of relationship with my little girl, sounds perfect.

 

Perfect but heart breaking at the same time now im not with my ex anymore. Words like that are priceless but the moment i drop them off tomorow ill be tempted to do something daft to try eliminate the pain

 

Don't mate, just don't.
It may jeopardise any future access you get.
Don't give her that satisfaction.

 

Easier said than done mate

 

Yes I know but just for now you just have to accept the way things are.
I'm on your side here man & trying to advise you.
Just go with the flow for now & see how things pan out.
Bide your time mate & make sure you meet all her lawyer requests.
Don't go in all guns blazing mate.
Keep your cool for those boys.

 

Thanks. Ill try

 

Look Teeside mackem

If you love your kids you MUST be strong and stay well

They will NEED you in the years to come

If your x tries to keep them from you in the future take it from me one day they WILL turn up at your door

Anything can happen in the future.
They may even end up with.you

You have got to be strong for them

Stay out of trouble

Open a saving account for each of them

Be there for them.

Thats the important thing

Also have as good a day as you can EVERYDAY

one minute you can be down

The next day...week...or month your life can be great

You NEVER know what the future holds

You will be ok for sure

Go out with your mates and live because lifes good and you WILL survive.

 

Print this up.

Put a copy in your pocket and carry it with you.

Pin a copy next to your bed.

Anything, just make sure you read it regularly, because that advice is worth a lot more than money.

 

Well just dropped them off, feel flat as a fart now so im off to the pub.

Cant even be arsed with the fact weve got a game in half an hour.