sittin in ma mates bit last night blitzed. foned a chinky n ma mate answered the door in the buff the old boy didny know wit wz hapnin, ****in funny as ****.
Talking of Chinkys A family of 4 came into The Auctioneers on Saturday, maybe it's cause I'm from the little hamlet of Paisley but I don't think I've ever seen a Chinese family in a boozer before. Anyway the faither, 50ish, is barking away at the mother and lassie and there giving him plenty back, it'all ying yang yow hing tang wang, then he pulls out his visa and the two women **** off oot the pub. His boy comes over to his seat with a big ****ing double burger and chips and is getting tore intae it. Then it sounds like the faither is having a right go at him anaw, but funnily finished his rant off nicely by saying calling his boy, "****!" Me and the Mrs were ****in pishing wersels, the faither settled down and was watching the Man City game on the telly, and on a couple of occasions called someone on the pitch, "Fanny". He was hysterical and he was drinkin Guinness Chinkys in the pub drinking are ****in brilliant!!
Dandered into the chinkers about 5 years ago to order a special fried rice or some ****e and there was this tiny chinese fella, about 4 foot tall wearing a Celtic top behind the counter. Walked up to the counter to give my order and the wee guy says "Alright mate, what's the craic" in a much broader Belfast accent that I can even jokingly muster. I burst out laughing while his faced turned sour in wondering what I was laughing at, I said "sorry mate but your ****in hilarious"
my platoon got a few replacements in theatre and one of them was a black guy frony st.vincent, asked him what his name was and he replies "shabba" ****ing brilliant, i was in stitches for about 10 minutes you could always tell where he was because people shouted "it's a lovers game! shabba!" wherever he went. i'm sure he loved it
