Off Topic Best things you've found

Ha. I wouldn't sell myself that cheaply like. I have standards.

 

You don't reallise what you've just admitted marra

 

Are you a metal detectorist?

 

I was £55. The jokes on you fella.

 

Certainly not.

 

Found a bag of weed once , thought all my birthdays had come at once.

 

When I was a kid we had a massive back garden that my dad had immaculate with his vegetable patches. The next garden up at a house where an old lady lived on her own after her two horrible brothers had died had never been touched for as long as anyone could remember. One day she asked my dad if he would do that garden as well and just give her the vegetables she needed so he agreed. I helped him in this massive clearing job and we found 3 gas masks from the war and a pair of false legs that had belonged to one of the brothers.
To cap it all off once we had cleared it and dug it all over the old bat changed her mind and said we can't plant anything.

 

Sex chat lines

 

10 years ago my wife and I found a plastic money packet with £250 in it outside our flat. We handed it into the police as it was enough money that someone probably missed it and were amazed when a few weeks later the police contacted us to say it hadn't been collected and we were free to have it ourselves (always just assumed the police 'took care' of it if no-one came to collect...).

 

Only last year £54,000 in an old cadburys chocolate biscuit tin tucked away in a dormer storage space wrapped in an old pillow case .

 

****ing typical, I find one false leg and then you had to black cat me with two

 

No kidding it was a dream which rapidly turned into a nightmare for me.

 

Difference being I knew they belonged to one of the brothers who had died from that house..I still remember what an obnoxious twat he was though..For the record I think my dad must have just hoyed the gas masks out...I bet they might have been worth a bob or two if we had kept them.

 

Were there any biscuits left?

 

Me and a few mates found a motor bike abandoned when we were kids, it didn't work and had been partially stripped so we used to just freewheel it down this big bank where we lived. One day the coppers caught us and after pleading our innocence for ages they decided to take it to the station along with us. Nothing happened cos they couldn't trace the owner and said we had to come back several weeks later and if it hadn't been claimed we could have it back but one of our fathers would have to be responsible for it. Anyway several weeks later they told us we could take it back but the ****ing ****ers made us push it all the way from Southwick nick back to Town End Farm. TWATS, no wonder I hate coppers. And as if that's not bad enough, my future son in law is a copper and a ****ing barcode Obviously I've told my daughter not to breed with the ****.

 

Can I borrow a tenner?

 

We found (again I use the term lightly, it was propped up against a shed) a scooter in an old allotment, it worked as well, it had one of them white storage boxes attached to the back. We were desperate to get inside it and see what was in it, we'd proposed several fantasies of what we hoped was inside but when we got it open, it was just a pair of motorbike gloves and a socket set.

 

No, but I know a couple of baritones you can loan..

 

Aye, if only eh? I found a silver shaving set in the workies yard where I lived, obviously some one on the estate must have died and the council cleared the house into a coupe of skips and dumped them in the yard. We bunked the fence and had a good rummage and I found loads of old cylinder vinyl records, i'd never seen anything like that before. There was also a nice silver shaving set with the handle and a head for each day, all beautifully engraved etc. We took the lot down Hylton Road to the second hand shops and got 50p for the ****ing lot. I wish i'd kept them now but as a kid you don't think of things like that eh?

 

Good times mate and sometimes I wish I could wind the clock back and relive some of them. We didn't have a care in the world back then eh? now it's mortgages and cars and all the other crap that comes with being an adult.