No' had a Wid Ye? for a while so... 24 stone pole dancer branded 'pig' by trolls strips to her undies and performs online https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/24-stone-pole-dancer-strips-13043179 please log in to view this image
That (titanium) pole must be riveted with the spares for the Forth Rail Bridge! Imagine if her hoose was in the same tenement as yours!
****. I'd run a mile. Reminds me of a little tale. Have you taken precaution? Yes I tied my shoe laces to the bed rail. Throwing a banana down an alley way springs to mind.