As I set down this mornings empty sherry decanter my thoughts turned , as always , to the machinations of the holy roman empire. I noted with some disquiet that my spunk- encrusted first edition of Nicholas Nickleby , signed by Richard Gough , lay dog-eared and crumpled between my voluminous thighs." What Popery is this ? " I asked myself . Undoubtedly journalists sympathetic to the roman catholic church had drugged me and arranged this shameful scene with the purpose of discreditiong my important and ground-breaking work. My initial suspicions were confirmed by the presence of a votive candle in my anal passage. Good Lord ! perhaps they had slipped communion wine into my sherry decanter and I was, at this very moment , being corrupted from within. Pausing only to quickly check for any remaining catholics under my bed I ran to the bathroom and forced myself to vomit copiously. " **** your Transubstantiation" , "**** your Neil Lennon" and" **** your European Cup" I thought with each wretch of my oesophagus. Feeling cleansed I donned my aluminium foil helmet , to ensure the deflection of holy roman mind control rays , and made my way to the writing bureau. Ever mindful of the cameras and listening devices installed in my law abiding protestant home by agents of the glasgow city council I shielded my computer screen from view with a beautifully realised oil on canvas portrait of the Martyr , donald findlay . Under his enigmatic smile and munificent protection I set to work. Then I stopped , headed for the drinks cabinet , poured a generous tumbler of bespoke blue absinthe and re-commenced my ongoing expose of the scottish media and how it is run from rome via kerrydale street. Oh , how to explain this Mick McCarthyism to the world .
just my humble tribute to the literary genius that is david leggat , legendary rangers-minded blogger......and close personal friend of mennie
I think it was the absinthe that did it rl. That **** totally ****s your head Absinthe makes the mind grow weirder.
only drank absinthe twice , the second time just being to check it was really that mental and not just a one off when I had it first time round.
http://www.thewhiskyexchange.com/P-161.aspx had 3 glasses of this stuff along with a couple of whiskys and was on my back.
They used to sell that stuff in Esko Bar in Aberdeen (Although that place shut in 2002) They had about 20 different brands of Absinthe for sale in there, me and my mate got blootered on it one night in there and I ended-up getting off with this African lassie. For weeks after that my mate kept shouting "Ed-die, Ed-die what have you done for me lately" at me like in Eddie Murphy RAW
ever tried bicardi 151? 85% drank it twice in Oz an spewed both times. ****in rank!! please log in to view this image
On holiday in Dominican Republic a few yaers ago, and they make double strength white rum. ****ing excellent with coke, smooth taste, but tended to cause knee failure after a wee while
I was drinking some of that in Time Square on Hogmanay with a beaner who had driven all the way from Mexico City to be there. He had homemade Rum/Bacardi with him, was like drinking petrol or something. ****ing rank. The boy was a magic laugh though.
the first times I drank ouzo and raki , had the same effect......sitting down drinking feeling on top of the world ...try to stand up and it all goes terrribly wrong
Hello, Rogueleader. I saw you linking back to this article on a more recent post (by DevAdvocate) – just in case you were wondering why someone would appear out of the blue like this, more than two months after the event. I don’t want to creep you out, after all. Not yet, anyway. I like this sort of thing and yours is funny and well-written. The man has very clearly become sick on his own bilious poison, losing all sense of perspective along the way. He deserves to be ridiculed and you’ve done a pretty good job, as far as I’m concerned. Nice one. I recently tried something similar with James Traynor over on 606, incidentally, although it was hardly a resounding success. I had to sign in with my normal account (Psychosomatic) and leave myself a positive comment – I could see that I was flagging under the weight of visiting Celtic fans who seemed to take what I’d written very literally – just to keep my spirits up. A bad day for democracy, I’m sure you’ll agree. I’d give you a link, obviously, but the thing got pulled by the preternaturally humourless mods at the BBC. I would have expected you to praise my satire quite lovingly, of course, so you’ve escaped pretty lightly, to my mind. I digress. I liked the thing you wrote, thanks. Very funny.
