Why Can't People Walk Normally? please log in to view this image Why canât people walk proper, like me? Why do some people have to walk like an idiot? What is it that makes someone walk so stupid? This is something I have often wondered. On my journey to work, I always see a man also on his commute. But there is something different about this man. Something that makes him stand out. It is his walking (I say âwalkingâ, it is that grey area between a brisk stroll and a jog. Like when you are on a treadmill as the speed is increasing from a walk to a light run, and you arenât too sure what speed to start running and you do that sort of slow motion jog, as walking would result in you falling off the back, and running would result in falling off the front). He looks like a maniac! Each stride is about 10 metres, he is leaning so far forward his nose is just scraping the ground, and one arm wings very violently. It is almost as if every morning he checks his watch and thinks, âDAMN, Iâm late again. I better walk quickerâ. His time keeping surely canât be that bad, so I have put it down to a poor walking technique. Since noticing this man, I have been paying particular attention to how people walk and have come up with the following styles: The Bouncer Potentially the most annoying of them all. It can be categorised by someone who sort of bounces on the balls of their feet, so their heel never actually makes contact with the ground. The annoyance is increased with the addition of âbouncyâ hair, where at the peak of the bounce, the hair appears to float above the individuals head. The Floater This is where the individual doesnât move their arms when walking, as if to create the illusion they are floating, or gliding across the ground. The favoured style of people who wear ankle length leather jackets and dark sunglasses, and people who class their top 3 ultimate films as The Matrix, Under Siege and Kung Fu Cult Master. The Lethargic Someone who walks so slowly, it makes you wonder whether this may be in fact the first time they have walked. This is particularly annoying when you need the loo. The Reader Someone who reads (yes, reads) whilst walking. I am all for being more efficient, but reading and walking are two things that should never be combined. It is a bit like combining archery with a visit to the library. Either way, it wonât end well. The Leaner This is where the individual leans excessively either forward, backwards or to the side. Not to sure why this is annoying, but it is. The Pendulum This is where someone swings there arms at a completely unnecessary level. This becomes considerably dangerous when the individual is holding a bag. After a considerable amount of time thinking about these styles, I wondered how they come about. At first, I assumed The Bouncer technique was adopted by small people as a means of increasing their height. But I then saw a tall person walking similar, with the back of their shoes looking seemingly unworn, whilst the front looked like they had taken part in a marathon, every day, since 1972. As for The Floater, this is obviously adopted by people who like David Blaine a bit too much, and therefore attempt to levitate everywhere. As for the remainder of these styles, I am still none the wiser. How can someone think walking at a speed one level up from standing still is an efficient means of travel? How do you decide walking and reading is a good idea? Surely someone who leans excessively constantly feels as if they are about to fall over? Doesnât someone using The Pendulum technique recognise the destruction they have caused by their flailing limbs? With the ability to get social suggestions to be discussed in the House of Commons, I think I may initiate a petition to suggest a scheme to get England walking properly. 100,000 people will definitely sign it.
You forgot the person who has to move his or her right arm and leg together or the person who when wearing sports clothing in the street has to walk without using their arms which have to have the forearms held away from the body but parallel to it.
Some very interesting life observations there BBW The lethargic Mrs N calls dawdlers! What about the knuckle draggers?
Just wish I could walk at all at the moment. Have now moved on to two sticks, and we invested in a wheel chair for shopping trips and so on. I watch people walking in the street and am exceedingly jealous- it's something we all take for granted until we lose it, like a lot of things in life, I suppose. My return to the Vic still seems a long way off. The guy I've been working with at the gym is very experienced in therapeutic work, and has this amazing ability to watch people walk and describe what's wrong with their action and how this will give them knee/hip/ankle/ whatever problems in later life. He says he can't switch off from doing this- the ultimate in people watching, studying their bio-mechanics! Ok, now I've cheered you all up I'll go back to my sulk.
Hoping you will get to the Vic soon GG also hope we havent upset you with any flippant comments! When Mrs N had her new knee she was on crutches for a while, used to take her half an hour to hobble down our drive now she can do it in seconds! I am sure all of us are hoping you get back walking soon !
No, no, don't worry, I'm fine. I'm sorry I poured a damper on a light hearted thread. I have been away from the forum partly because I've been busy with family and NHS stuff; also now the football has started I feel sort of helpless, particularly given our grim start to the season. I've been lurking, and reading with a fair amount of dismay, but being unable to comment in any constructive way I've kept quiet.
This is a silly thread - why would anyone walk unless they are too poor to drive a Merc or BMW or something nice - walking is a horrible thing that only Welsh and poor people should do
interesting comment Leo I like walking ......the dogs by the beach or in the countryside good way of relaxing and winding down after stressful trips away
I dont like walking. Its too much effort and you cant just switch off you have to keep focused and keep thinking right leg, left leg. I would rather Bike or drive.
Oh - don't get me wrong Norway - now if you take the dogs and a gun you might find rabbits and such like which adds a whole lot more fun to it. Seem to remember you're a hunting man
They must teach them differently these days - I've never ever had the need to remind myself 'right leg left leg'! It sort of happens without any thought for me
This is a fantastic comment! Walking isn't too bad. But this isn't the problem. Why can't we all just walk normal, like me?
