One day an Italian Man went to a restaurant in Malta and wanted two pieces of toast, and the waiter gives him one, and the Italian man says "I want two piece" The waiter said "go to the toilet" The Man says "You no understand I want two piece on my plate" then the waiter says "You better not piss on the plate you son of a bitch!" The man says "I did not even know her and she calls me a Son of a Beach?" Then he goes to a bigger restaurant and finds himself with a spoon and a knife but no fork, he says "I want a fock" the waiter says "Everybody wants to ****" and he says "You no understand I want to fock on the table" and the waiter says "You better not **** on the table you son of a bitch!" Then later he goes to a hotel and in bed he doesn't have a sheet "Call the manager im telle him I wanna sheet!" says the Italian man, then the other guy says "Go to the toliet" and the Italian man say "You no understand I wanna sheet in my bed!" and the other guy says you better not **** in the bed you son of a bitch!" and the Italian man goes to the check out corner and the check out says "Peace on you" and the Italian man says "PISS ON YOU TOO, YOU SON OF A BEACH! I'M GOING BACK TO ITALY!"
A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together. I come again. Two asses, dey come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a more." "You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly, "in this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, coola down lady," said the man, "Imma just tellun my friend howa to spella Mississippi."
