Things more useful that Joselu

Herpes.
A chocolate fire guard.
A diet book at Obi’s house.

 

He appears to be £5m wasted. I would rather have given Armstrong a go.

 

Right now I’d rather give Shola or Guivarch..

 

I'm not a huge Mitro fan by ant means.................. but surely he deserves a run in the starting eleven now over Joselu?

 

Everything on earth is more useful than Jose Louise. Big question for Benitez though; how the **** do you keep faith with a player who's been subbed in 10 matches?

 

slip him a fat waiter 4ins special

 

I was going to say Lejune and Manquillo. But even Hosselu isn't that bad

 

I hate the way it's set up. Nobody seems comfortable at all. So many of our players don't feel like ours at all. What we must do is get back to 4231 asap and get the right line up in to be much more disciplined.

We desperately need Lascelles back in and Lejeune has to drop down for a bit. Dummett has got to improve on Mankini. When we have better shape it helps the forwards.

For me the very best line up we could go with is Elliot, Yedlin, Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Hayden, Shelvey, Ritchie, Merino, Murphy/Atsu and Perez. Yep since Perez was dropped we've been somehow even worse. I hate Joselu and there's just no point talking about Mitrovic. I'm also just utterly unconvinced by Gayle so my suggestion is to get the midfield stronger with all three in there, push merino up a bit and let Perez lead the line. He works hard to defend from the front .

 

chocolate fireguard...................... goalscorer my arse ... tries but not effective in any way

 

My girlfriends cats.

 

What’s wrong with her pussy mate?

 

A bit feisty and whenever I want to play, it bites my head off

 

So our team form has dipped since Ayoze Perez was dropped - coincidence?

 

A turd going around a toilet bowl counter clockwise.

 

A carrier bag with no handles and a hole in the bottom.
Is still infinitely more use than Joselu.

 

He was dropped at exactly the same time as we switched to 4-4-2. And the same time as Lascelles got injured and Clark came in. Probably bigger factors in the dip in form.

 

Marcelino and Cacapa’s civil partnership love child.

 

That would be Riviere

 

Albert wants to melt Joselu down and turn him into a pair of mustard chinos