The Sports Direct Confessional

Here is a place for you to confess your sins and ask for forgiveness for buying something from Sports Direct recently.....

I'd like to confess to buying a compression top and a pair of astro turf boots for my lad. I also bought our new home shirt too recently.

I shop there because I save a few quid. There I said it. I'm kind of a bargain hunting prostitute with little to no morals.

Damm that felt good........



















(just like when I receive my complimentary SD mug each time I do mail order)

 

I shop there only because I know it helps to keep the thousands of staff there in gainful employment...

 

Here's my confession:

I ain't buying your ****e Mike! So bugger off! There, I said it. Will I go to Heaven now?

 

You will indeed Obi... just drop a pound in the unsolicited oversized SD mug on your way out and Mike will forgive you...

 

I confess to picking up the dog sh!te with a Sports Direct bag and then selling the said sh!te(bag included) on EBay as a genuine Poyet.

 

You bastard Jim.
I bought that as his signature and was horrified to received said turd instead of my expected autograph.
Plus the SD bad had a tear in it.

 

You bugger, that cost me £50 as well! And then the postie just shoved it through letter box!

 

Trust me fellas these Poyet originals will be worth a fortune in years to come as there's a post on the Sunderland board saying he's going for quality rather than quantity.

 

So he would prefer a Baluga Caviar dump to a Morrisons Beans one then?

 

How will he measure 'quality' in this instance?

Does it include aroma?
Is it about texture?
Density?
The shape he can get it into?

 

Ultimately he'd like free flowing but at the minute it's just plain old sh!te.

 

I heard he wants thing more solid at the back, more runs from midfield, less lumping it up the middle and more spraying it out wide.

 

Sounds like he's going to dump the old system which has become a bit stagnant and hope to wipe the floor with the opposition.

 

He's using scientific approaches to measure performance too. He has a log of each players' movements.

 

That sounds quite constipated, he'll have to work it out with a pencil, however that's another tissue.

 

Bought a pair of heavily discounted trainers from them many moons ago ...fell to bits in a few weeks and hence why heavily discunted <<(think I will leave that spulling mistake in)..Never been back, I know I have fallen from grace with SD-Ashley and my soul is now teetering on eternal SD damnation, but...screw you, you zero hour, sweat shop licking reptile

You can't polish a turd, but you can always roll it in pink glitter for sale on ebay as a genuine 'my little Poyet'

 

I bought some football socks and a pair I football boots.

 

Then you sir will be damned to hell for all eternity!







Or, you could take out a special redemption policy of just £500 per month for the rest of your life and all will be forgiven. You only need to send us your account details and we'll sort it all for you. It's all part if the service with a

 

I bought some boxing training gear there a few years back but i've not been in there for ages.

No intention of going back, unless I pick up the gloves again.

 

I Confess to buying goods in Three Sports Direct Stores in 2014 - in Gateshead, Stoke and Nottingham.
Trainers and other goods.

I have also bought Jeans and T-Shirts from USC, which weren't that cheap and are of decent quality.

Finally for good measure, I have encouraged my wife to shop at Debenhams and House of Fraser, thus helping swell the coffers of Mike Ashley even further.

I deserve to be flogged at the gates of SJP.