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The Return Of The Final Countdown

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Joelinton's Right Foot, Apr 1, 2018.

  1. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    The Final Countdown

    Games To Go: 7

    Current Position: 12th

    Current Points: 35


    Points Required To Avoid Finishing Bottom : 4/21
    Points Required To Avoid Finishing 2nd Bottom: 11/21
    Points Required To Avoid Relegation: 14/21

    Points Required To Finish 14th (average prediction at season start): 20/21
    Points Required To Finish Top Half: 21/21

    Points Required To Finish Above Sunderland:
    <laugh><laugh><laugh>


    Highest Possible Finish: 5th
    Lowest Possible Finish: 20th


    Predicted Final Table

    Using a top secret and copyrighted formula, I am also predicting the final league positions:

    1. Man City - 103
    ------------------------
    2. Man Utd - 84
    3. Liverpool - 81
    4. Spurs - 80
    ------------------------
    5. Chelsea - 66
    ------------------------
    6. Arsenal - 60
    7. Burnley - 57
    8. Leicester - 53
    9. Everton - 49
    10. Bournemouth - 44
    11. Watford - 44
    12. Newcastle United - 43
    13. Brighton - 40
    14. Swansea - 39
    15. West Ham - 39
    16. Crystal Palace - 36
    17. Huddersfield - 36
    -----------------------------------
    18. Southampton - 35
    19. Stoke - 31
    20. West Brom - 23
     
    #1
    General Lee Speaking likes this.
  2. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    T
     
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  3. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    We need 20 points to finish 14th? Well we know where Stephen Hawkin hasn’t re-incarnated.

    <doh>
     
    #3
  4. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    FFS <doh>

    Mathematically......
    at the minute........

    It's a ****ing countdown - the numbers will get less you arsewomble!!!
     
    #4
  5. Consett Mag

    Consett Mag Well-Known Member

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    Hey Mbemba - If your top secret & copyrighted formula stands up, we need just one point to escape relegation - yay!! I'm confident that we can do this!

    But regarding the formula - if it's top secret why does it need to be copyrighted? You haven't got unsecured wireless have you?
     
    #5
  6. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Just in case I have a few too many Irn Bru's in the Earl before a match and let the formula slip. Can't be too careful with that bunch of bastards!!
     
    #6
  7. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    No it’s not mathematically correct. You’re failing to take into account that if one team wins then another one loses and that impacts on how many points we need.

    You’re seriously making Chippy look a genius with his insurance bets with your calculations. And speaking for those who have been to the Earl pre-match let me say your formula is safe, very safe.
     
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    J. J. McClure likes this.
  8. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Actually I've taken that into account. At this point, games where two teams play each other don't impact on that total, as it is still possible for enough teams to get enough points to require us to get 20 points to mathematically be certain of 14th place (and all the other totals listed). That could change once the results of those games are impacted by other scores.
     
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  9. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    There's surprisingly few games left between teams in the bottom eleven when you consider how many games are left to play overall. I didn't take into account our games against bottom 11 teams (WBA and Watford) because the outcome of those is already covered in the points we currently, mathematically need. No combination of scores of the games below change any of the individual points targets.

    AFC Bournemouth v Crystal Palace
    Brighton & Hove Albion v Huddersfield Town
    West Bromwich Albion v Swansea City
    Crystal Palace v Brighton
    Huddersfield v Watford
    West Ham v Stoke
    Watford v Crystal Palace

    Southampton v Bournemouth
    Bournemouth v Swansea
    Stoke v Crystal Palace
    Crystal Palace v West Brom
    Swansea v Stoke
     
    #9
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2018
  10. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    :emoticon-0111-blush

    Just playing devil’s advocate so that you could make those points clear. I really believed in you.

    :bandit:
     
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  11. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Bollocks!

    I could smell the cogs in your brain burning from here as you tried to work out a way to prove me wrong <laugh>
     
    #11
  12. Judge Death

    Judge Death Well-Known Member

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    So can we have one for the mackems like we did last year as well??

    I'd lend a hand, but that would mean revealing that I know your top secret, copyrighted formula...












    <whistle>
     
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  13. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    T.

    Trev is exposed.
     
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  14. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    Only by No Chance’s high powered binoculars.
     
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  15. JakartaToon

    JakartaToon Well-Known Member
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    It doesn’t really matter whether you are right or wrong - this will probably be the last update we get.
     
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  16. General Lee Speaking

    General Lee Speaking Well-Known Member

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    Have you worked that out using all combinations of results, taking into account that teams will play each other and drop points against each other?
     
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  17. General Lee Speaking

    General Lee Speaking Well-Known Member

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    OK, every other twat's right - read to the end of the thread before posting.
     
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  18. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    Fill your boots! I can't work out any logic system that takes account of how the mackems play!
     
    #18
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  19. Joelinton's Right Foot

    Joelinton's Right Foot Worth Every Penny
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    The Final Countdown

    Games To Go: 6

    Current Position: 10th

    Current Points: 38


    Points Required To Avoid Finishing Bottom : 0
    please log in to view this image

    Points Required To Avoid Finishing 2nd Bottom: 5/18
    Points Required To Avoid Relegation: 9/18

    Points Required To Finish 14th (average prediction at season start): 15/18
    Points Required To Finish Top Half: 16/18

    Points Required To Finish Above Sunderland:
    <laugh><laugh><laugh>


    Highest Possible Finish: 5th
    Lowest Possible Finish: 19th




    I haven't checked how clubs playing each other affect this yet. I'll do that after tomorrow's games.
     
    #19
  20. JakartaToon

    JakartaToon Well-Known Member
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    This seems a really pointless exercise but as you are updating it I will not knock it again. To understand our position properly you should be doing it for each club.
     
    #20

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