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Tash Sperm Explosion Cup LIVE DRAW

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012.

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  1. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Welcome to the live thread coverage of the draw for the first ever Tash Sperm Explosion Cup Draw!!!

    There will be 4 groups, 1 of 5 members and 3 of 6 members. The top two of each group shall go through to the knockout stages. The games will be head-to-head versions of the current league format. You know the score with the Fifa system, 3 points for a win, 1 point for a draw, 0 for a loss, and £100,000 in my bank account if I vote Blatter again <ok>

    So, here are the seedings for today's proceedings (the live draw shall start around 7pm)...

    Top seeds DT (ball 1), LTF (ball 2), Chris1986 (ball 3), ColoC (ball 4).

    Second seeds Pulp (ball 5), Freddd (ball 6), EastStand (ball 7), G4rd (ball 8).

    Third seeds SPMS (ball 9), BaofCisse (ball 10), Katmandu (ball 11), AB (ball 12).

    Fourth seeds GITF (ball 13), Jimiley (ball 14), Santy (ball 15), JPF (ball 16).

    Fifth Seeds Obi Wan (ball 17), JamesBond (ball 18), LadyEl (ball 19), ACS (ball 20).

    Last Seeds SirBob'sJig (ball 21), TTT (ball 22), abcofCisse (ball 23).

    For the purposes of imagination and the avoidance of mental scarring thinking about me doing this draw in my pants with scrumpled up bits of paper, think about two annoying Norwegians doing overly long speeches about the proceedings and their (limited) understanding of football, before some very precise presentations by monotonous German's, while models in short cut spangles complete the moves out of Cher's "It's in his kiss" video to keep Sepp's blood pumping for a bit...
     
    #1
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  2. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    God, who let the Norwegian's back on?

    "Yar dee yar Noooo our trees are dying yarp lun ker John Carew the best ever player yard urn barden barden It's cold here can we come home with you ya zhee"
     
    #2
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  3. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    ANNOUNCEMENT!!! ON A FRIDAY!!!


    I tweeted Ant and Dec asking if they'd like to help out with the draw... They're considering it... Any other big hitters I should aim for?
     
    #3
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  4. LTF

    LTF Well-Known Member

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    Well isn't this exciting, feels quite showbusinessy, almost tempted to put a party frock on for the occasion!
     
    #4
    LTF, Nov 23, 2012
  5. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    <diva>I'm already rocking a smashing low cut number<laugh>
     
    #5
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  6. ...And Out Come the Wolve

    ...And Out Come the Wolve New Member

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    Whats going on???
     
    #6
    ...And Out Come the Wolve, Nov 23, 2012
  7. Pulp

    Pulp Well-Known Member

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    Uhm, can we get subtitles for these Norwegians please? I'm sure one of them just said something about living in a long boat whilst eating brown cheese? that can't be right!
     
    #7
    Pulp, Nov 23, 2012
  8. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    We have a game where people can pick players from the Newcastle squad, and they score points when Tash gives them a score in one of his post-game threads... This is the Cup tie in to the League, found on the other thread!
     
    #8
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  9. LTF

    LTF Well-Known Member

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    Looks like PAM and I are going to have a 'Dress Off' if you know what I mean?
     
    #9
    LTF, Nov 23, 2012
  10. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Is it the paper that's scrumpled up or your pants?
     
    #10
    Agent Bruce, Nov 23, 2012

  11. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Dresses off? Can I watch?
     
    #11
    Agent Bruce, Nov 23, 2012
  12. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Do they come any bigger than Ant and Dec?
     
    #12
    Agent Bruce, Nov 23, 2012
  13. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    <laugh>

    Afraid not... Fifa couldn't hire translators or subtitles in case there are mics on wor Blatter when he's not looking... He has tourettes, except he exclaims stupidity every time he has a tick.<ok>

    And here comes Pele, shaking like Muhammed Ali (well it is f-ing Norway, and they haven't put the heating on... not enough mooses to burn)... He says no matter who wins, they'll never be as good as guessing who'll play well in black and white according to Tash, as him. Not even if they score more points or win more cups in the future... Not even if they can stick it in the European forums for their entire career, instead of f-ing off to the crappy states to bag a few... <whistle>
     
    #13
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  14. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, way bigger, they're only little fellas even if one stands on the other... <ok>
     
    #14
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  15. Colocreamy

    Colocreamy Active Member

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    I am genuinely more excited for this than for any normal cup draw o_O
     
    #15
    Colocreamy, Nov 23, 2012
  16. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    1224 rep?

    We're twins.
     
    #16
    Agent Bruce, Nov 23, 2012
  17. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Is it because they've flown in the food from Iceland for this do?



    Mini-eclairs, Kerry Katona you've outdone yourself!
     
    #17
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  18. ...And Out Come the Wolve

    ...And Out Come the Wolve New Member

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    Aaaah ok. Bon idee chaps.
     
    #18
    ...And Out Come the Wolve, Nov 23, 2012
  19. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Sorry ladies and gents, everything was help up because we had to send Prince Harry to Platini's aid after a horrible toilet accident... Brave boy that Harry
     
    #19
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
  20. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    These things always start late, so of course we have to taste more Norwegian dancing... And I thought Totem pole dancing was a forgotten art...


    In other news, Peter Herbert rejected my invitation to come tonight. He said, and I quote, "If-ing hate those ice choc Norwegian scum. They are a lesser race, hence their blond hair, and love of snow." Fair enough <ok>
     
    #20
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Nov 23, 2012
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