as its liverpool today, a short story i found on their cult hero. a DNA test conducted on all premiership players reveales that uninspirational liverpool captain was in fact only 1/4 of his currently mentioned age. the fa had decided to carry out dna tests on all premiership players to pre- resolve any dispute like the one that arose last year over the probable age of oberfemiwhatever martins. but against all their expectations the test also exposed gerrards actual age. when the dna results arrived last night, officals were shocked to find that gerrard had all the physical and mental characteristics of a 7 year old. the results had the following results as backup 1. gerrard has no facial or chest hair. no one has checked for public hair yet. 2. gerrard can't spell PSYCHOLOGICAL no wait thats hard for anyone. 3. gerrard thinks alex curran is hot. 4. gerrard never speaks like a grown up. all his conversations seem like that of a kid. his game also reflects the same. 5. above all gerrard is a liverpool supporter and player. it is certain that mr. gerrard or rather master gerrard will be plying his trade in the u-12 division from this year onwards. but it is also certain that he won't win the epl u-12 division with liverpool.
