Rival watch

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If anyone's spectacularly bored later or really missing football, there's a game on the BBC.
Dundee United face AZ Alkmaar in a Europa Conference League qualifier at Tannadice.
It's on the iPlayer for all and BBC Scotland for our North of the border correspondents.
Not that desperate, I'm going to dig a verruca out of my foot with a blunt kitchen knife instead
 
If anyone's spectacularly bored later or really missing football, there's a game on the BBC.
Dundee United face AZ Alkmaar in a Europa Conference League qualifier at Tannadice.
It's on the iPlayer for all and BBC Scotland for our North of the border correspondents.
In the ‘80s these two might have been playing for much higher stakes
 
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Dundee United take the lead against Alkmaar:
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Former Man Utd youngster Dylan Levitt starts the move. Looks a decent prospect.
 
The Chelsea spending spree continues. Are we sure Abramovich isn't still in charge?

I knew somehow they’d come out of this summer smelling of roses

They’ve actually made some good signings, i don’t think they’ll get close to City or Liverpool but best of the rest again is easily possible for them