From the Daily Mash..... http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport...ark-football-ruins-5000-picnics-2012052828612 THE inconsiderate park football season got off to a flying start this weekend, with a record number of picnics ruined. The popular amateur sport involves bringing a football to a park and using it to annoy other members of the public who are trying to have a relaxing afternoon. Points are awarded according to how irritating the players can be, for example by kicking the ball into someoneâs salsa dips, ricocheting it off a child or humiliating any passers-by who complain about the proximity of the makeshift jumper-built goalposts to someone in a wheelchair. There is a special two-point bonus for shouting âOi Clayton, you ****er, over here!â in the general direction of some pensioners. Tom Logan of the Inconsiderate Park Football Association said: âItâs great to be out there again in the parks, ruining it for everyone else. âWhatâs brilliant about our game is that itâs totally non-exclusive, all you need is a big gob and no scruples. âPlus thereâs no corporations involved, itâs just the people annoying the people.â Inconsiderate park football was created in 1974 by Stephen Malley, who after repeatedly toe-punting his football into a pushchair realised that the angry reactions of other park users were more rewarding than scoring goals. Malley is also the creator of the famous âDomino Malleyâ technique, whereby an exceptional skilful player kicks the ball into someone drinking a hot drink, causing them to spill it on a passing bull terrier which consequently bites them.
