Carmines comments about his mate got me thinking, what adventures have you had with or in a shed? Not an old car...an actual shed. After 23 years of being a military gyppo, when we got our own place, first thing I did was buy a shed. 8 foot by 6 foot. Metal one. Took me all weekend up to put up and was a wonder I didn't cut something off when sliding in the razor sharp steel sheets that make up the walls. In hindsight, Metal looks good, zero maintenance (no rust after 5 years) but, you couldn't bolt anything to the walls, put shelves up, and it was like a tandoori oven in the summer, and a freezer in the winter. Was really just a big metal box, but it was MY big metal box. I reduced it in size to 6x4, but it was still not quite right, or in fact that useful. So this summer, it had to go. I took it down and took it all to the tip, and when I unloaded it, the Scrappy didn't judge me for the tear in my eye. He knew. He silently helped me carry it to the metal recycling bin. We (she) has decided we do not now need a shed but she'd be OK with a gazebo, which in all honesty I was initially surprised about because I didn't think our garden was big enough for an African deer, but having seen what she meant, and she's got her eye on a wooden Chinese style one, I'm actually looking forward to getting it and putting it up myself. Shed stories here please guys....
This has already been covered in depth. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Fifty-Sheds-Grey-Erotica-not-too-modern/dp/0752265458
I think my shed has got mice underneath it. I did stick a load of poison down a hole the little bastards had made some time ago but I think they're back. I say this because my pooch is always scratching around the bottom of it. I'm ****ing plagued with vermin at the moment.
One of the funniest articles I ever read was about a bloke who did a full remake of the film Das Boot (3hrs 20mins) in his garden shed. He had specially positioned holes drilled in the roof and during the depth charge scenes he got a few of his mates to shake the shed while another poured water through the holes.
[video=youtube;HLjS3gzHetA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLjS3gzHetA[/video] 2!! Now thats a ****ing dream come true.
Rick 'Seven Sheds' Witter... [video=youtube;8VED67gUNXM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VED67gUNXM[/video]
I have two sheds actually. Well like i said, iv'e got an allotment,so one there and one at home. I'm not happy with the allotment one, it's just one of them B&Q lap things. I'd love to build one down there, but it'd only get burgled or a jealous plot renter(you would be shocked at the behaviour of some of them) would burn it down. The poly tunnel was always going to be high maintenance,and tbf the cover is the only damage done, but it is worth it. We grow shed loads (fnar) of tomatoes and very exotic chillies in there. Now the shed at home...
I sacked sheds off and just slum it with a double garage now. There is something very British about a shed, I have considered a garden office shed, just to get back on the 'shed' market. But the Mrs will just fill it with ****e.
2? Ya greedy bastard! Im interested about your comments on the plot renters...isn't all "The Good Life" down on the allotments??
A few are like are "Tom & Barbara", but there are far darker types down there who take everything far too seriously. They are very ruthless people, Happy. An Allotment site is no place for the faint hearted, i can tell you. If you have a bumper crop of King Eddies for instance, and theirs has blight, they'll stop at nothing to discredit you and i mean "they will stop at nothing". One year i went down there to find my land stank of petrol. Yes. And another time some bastard broke into my shed and stole my fork...god i miss that fork. Here's a funny story for you though. One night last summer,i'd suffered terrible insomnia (i was worried about our striker options) so i got up and went down the allotment very early. I wasn't going to do much so i took my Guiness book of records down there and settled down under the apple tree. To my surprise, the old bloke from four plots further south appeared pushing a barrow. He hadn't seen me, and i wasn't going to get into another conversation about his lumbago, so i just observed. It only turns out the barrow had two sacks of potatoes in it, and the sad **** started burying them into three rows. I know some would say i should have done something, but all i felt was sadness. Interesting fact... Edin Jakupovic is on the waiting list for a plot, on the very same site.
Bloody hell Kempy, they always looked like oasis's of calm and genuine back to basics niceness. Reminded me of a time when you could leave yer front door open. You're painting a very dark picture of them that is, to be frank, scary and sinister.
So do you think Carmine's mates shed might not have actually been destroyed by the weather, but by someone jealous of his massive cabbages? Carmine, surely you of all people wouldn't be scared off helping your mate due to psychotic plot renters?!
Some of these people stay overnight in caravans that they have on their plots. They wear wolf fleeces and baseball caps covered in pin badges. They have poor dental hygiene. I'm not say all of them are like this but a lot are. They are like urban hill billies. I'm not ****ing about with these people, I've seen The Hills Have Eyes.
