It was Sunday dinner time and I had just been playing football with my little 5 year old boy Patrick and we were speaking about football. He has always been an NCFC fan as far as I know and has gone to a few games with me. He then informs me that he supports Chelski instead of Norwich! The wife looks at me and I go red and start shaking, I ask him why and he says that they are better than Norwich and he just prefers them! Little sod! Advice please? Adoption? Please help.
I suppose it could have been worse - it could have been another team that plays in blue! A spell on the naughty step may help!
He said his friend supports them so I have to track him down and av a word in his shell like. And Dave, that would be and absolute disaster, he would have to leave.
I would be more accepting if in teenage years he informs me he is gay. As long as he doesn't support Ipswich.
Hang the little bastard off a roof by his feet that should work, this kids a bad and destructive influence.
I assume you have smoke alarms in your house kemp. Inform your son that they are indeed 'Santa Cams', and that Santa is watching little boys to see if they have been good or bad. This obviously includes changing football teams. This may do the trick
Maybe this is a good moment to air something that I have never before discussed. My nephew supports that blue team. I've been beating myself up over it for years. I thought I did everything right. His parents weren't interested in football so I thought his destiny was preordained. I bought him the Norwich romper suit. I have pictures of him wearing a Norwich jacket as a toddler. Then somewhere along the line it all went wrong. First couple of weeks at his football practice, someone turned up and gave them all free tickets to that other place. Basically those b'stards groomed him. They showed him the newly painted turnstiles and everything. At first I thought he just wanted to wind me up but he's been seriously brainwashed. He's now 10 and we've never watched a match together. Good luck with your son. If he hasn't fallen in with a bad crowd of similarly minded 5 year olds then there is still some hope. For me all hope is lost. Don't judge me.
My limited knowledge of child psychology offers me four main techniques. 1. Bribary: Offer to buy him something every time he goes to see Norwich. For me, early trips to Carra Rud were always accompanied by a packet of sweets and a happy trip to the pub with my dad if Norwich won or played well. I realise now that it wasn't so much the sweet bribe that worked but rather the opportunity to spend time with my Dad, especially as we got older and didn't always see eye to eye. 2. lies: tell him that there is a law that you have to support either your local club or your Dad's team. I'm hoping that with my boys the lure of Gillingham is not enough to stop them supporting City when I envoke this clause. 3. Blackmail: A friend of mine was told he would have no pocket money if he chose Man Utd. He relented. 4. The truth: Just tell him how important it is to you that he supports Norwich. At the age of 5 kids idolise their Dad and respect his opinions (if only that lasted)
I guess there is a bad apple in every family. The only silver lining, if such a thing is possible with a tale like this, is that his younger brother has seen at first hand the devastating consequences of such stupidity. The tears, the disappointment, the constant envy at premier league neighbours. The poor lad has had to witness it all. Needless to say, he has chosen the right path.
What you need is to make sure his friends support NCFC and then they can laugh and ridicule them into supporting them.... that's what I did at school to my friends
