Ode to Nigel

THERE WAS A PROUD SERIOUS FOOTBALL MAN AT LESTA
WHO GOT STABBED IN THE BACK BY A FOREIGN JESTA!

A WHITE KNIGHT RODE IN FROM HULL CITY
AND SAID “COME OVER HERE PAL YOU’LL BE SITTING PRETTY”!

SO HE THOUGHT FOR A BIT THEN WENT IN A FLICK
COS YOU SEE FROM HIS STEEL CRIB IT WAS ONLY A KLICK!

AND ALTHOUGH HE TRIED AND TRIED AS HE DROVE EVERY MILE
HE FOUND IT ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO SMILE

AND FEELING UNLOVED THINGS WERE BOUND TO FESTA….
SO WITH A STAB AT THE KNIGHT
HE TOOK QUICK FLIGHT
AND WENT BACK TO YET ANOTHER FOREIGN JESTA

 

Decent rhyme, not sure it'll catch on though.

 

There once was a bloke called NP
Who's so boring this ends on line 3
He's at Leicester now.

 

Class.

How long that take you to come up with that?

 

There once was a gaffer at Hull,
The fans found incredibly dull,
He said he'd rather fester,
At his old club Leicester,
Now isn't that something to mull