Newcastle apply for voluntary relegation

From The Daily Mash...

Newcastle apply for voluntary relegation

NEWCASTLE have volunteered to be relegated from the Premier League, following their 6-0 defeat at home to Liverpool.

As the table stands they would have an excellent chance of avoiding demotion, but the club said it would be for the best if they were to drop down to the second tier to avoid further embarrassment.

They have asked if they can go down straight away, playing their last three fixtures against Championship opponents rather than Premier League teams.

Newcastle manager Alan Pardew said: “That 6-0 defeat hit us hard. Every last player in our team was crying like a baby in the dressing room and nobody from Liverpool came in to say that they were sorry, even though they must have been able to hear us through the wall.

“If it’s all the same to everyone, we’d prefer to play teams like Doncaster Rovers.”

This is not the first time this season a team has volunteered for relegation – Queens Park Rangers asked to be relegated in September after seven games of the 2012-13 season but were refused permission.

Following the draw with Reading that confirmed their demotion, a smiling Harry Redknapp said: “We had to do it the hard way but we got there in the end.”

 

.

 

Alan Pardew's time is up.They are going push him at the end of the season

 

I know in football that contracts aren't worth the paper they are signed on, but that would be a new low in terms of torching contracts - an 8-year deal over in less than 1...

 

Seems legit.

 

Reports suggests that Mike Ashley insisted on a clause that means it only costs one years salary to sack Pardew.

 

tash remarked that a couple weeks back when we were joshing about this. Whats the point of an 8 year deal if he can terminate with with one year componsation. mind you its all show with ashley... 8 years was some sort of look at my genius moment while they were flying high... now they are shot down in may.... theres a asong about this somewhere.

Again, newcastle would be better without ashely and pardew and I still hope they stay up even if they do like to rub carroll in. I can forgive that seeing we took hamann and a few others off them (all for fair fees btw)

 

I think it makes sense. Gives the manager backing and security so long as he does an adequate job. If he fails or the owner just decides to be a **** the manager still gets a heft payout. For a manager of Pardews standing, thats a pretty damn good deal!

 

Gives power to the club. For the next eight years if anyone tries to head hunt Pardew then Ashley could demand an AVB-esque fee. It probably made sense at the time - rumour are he was just behind Rafa on Abramovich's list of "managers some people think are good"

 

Rafa's done well considering what he has had to deal with at that disgusting small club and its small minded plastic fans and the swag bags full of "stolen oil" money

 

What team wouldn`t admit they were not good enough for the premiership if Liverpool beat them 0-6?

 

if RA had pardew on a list i'd question where he got the oil money cos i'd put him with frank spencer type of level of brains if he did.