Off Topic New Sponsors

Saw this on FB and it made me chuckle so thought I'd share. Any other suggestions?

New football sponsors for the coming season:

Arsenal - Bang & Olufsen (looks stylish, sounds foreign and fancy but finished product lacking).
Aston Villa - Nuts magazine (the manager is a bit of a lad).
Bournemouth - Saga Holidays (useful when planning a visit to the seaside).
Chelsea - Facebook (massive company but only formed in 2004).
Crystal Palace - Marshall Amps (popular enough, and they make a lot of noise).
Everton - Pepsi (big name, but most people prefer their rivals).
Leicester - Babestation (because of ex-manager Nigel Pearson's son and some of his team-mates' antics on the end of season tour to Thailand).
Liverpool - Amstrad (big in the 80s and not likely to make any sort of comeback anytime soon).
Man City - Mr Kipling (so Yaya Toure always has cake).
Man United - Apple (market leaders for a long time but have been a bit dodgy since their leader departed).
Newcastle - Ryanair (their customers are always complaining, a match made in heaven).
Norwich - Blossom Hill wine (inspiring Delia Smith since the 1990s).
Southampton - DFS (they've always got a sale on, but only in the Liverpool branch).
Stoke - NHS dentists (you never look forward to it, but you know you have to go and visit them once a year).
Sunderland - Wimpy (not the most appetising meal but still around).
Swansea - Megabus (great value for long trips up and down the country).
Tottenham - Mercedes Benz (new model every season but plummets in value at the turn of the year).
Watford - Fiat (dodgy product, and run by Italians).
West Brom - Thomas Cook (likely to start their holidays in January).
West Ham - Hubba Bubba (good for blowing bubbles but leave a nasty taste in your mouth).

 

Sunderland - Tampax (fans are a complete set of bleeding fannies)