With Kiwi about to win the Lottery this weekend, I feel it is time we started writing our hard luck, begging letter as apparently he is going to be very charitable towards his fellow Not606ers. So who will be the first with their heartbreaking tale of woe Obviously no truth is required .
Dear Kiwi, I desperately need a "loan" for £250,000 to save the life of the most important person in my life. The thing is, my budgie - Gazza - was taken ill with severe haemorrhoids, which involved numerous visits to the vets, expensive ointment, eleven operations, and constant nursing for the next six months. Gazza finally made a full recovery, but then on his first day out of his cage.........I find this very difficult to talk about...........he.......he.....flow into a closed window, and broke his neck. He is now in traction, sleeping in an orthopaedic bed, and will never be able to fly again, UNLESS, I can raise enough money to be able to take him to the top aviary surgeon in the world - Professor Krolchsteiner - whose clinic is based in the Himalayas. He has said that if I can raise the £250,000, he will do everything possible to make Gazza's remaining days as comfortable as possible. Please, please, please, can you see your way (after your big Lottery win) to sending me a cheque for the above amount, made payable to 'Woopert's World Cruise Holiday Fund', so I can take Gazza on a memorable holiday of a lifetime. Yours pleadingly, Woopert
I would never write a begging letter, because i value life in a different way to some people. You are born and you will die is my outlook on life. The bit in between is just about level of comfort. The truth be known i would quite happily die of starvation then write a begging letter, it is down to humans to notice the suffering around them, if they fail that and to open their eyes and mind then death is a saviour. From the favela's of Brazil to the subterranean network of tunnels below the streets of Bucharest. Desperate people have proven they can survive in extreme circumstances in the so called modern world. Hell holes of the planet but survival just the same. What would i do if you gave me your lotto win, squander and waste it on selfish comfort's and holidays, why, because we are the human race. But at least i'm open and honest unlike many begging letters lottery winners probably receive. After all lottery winners, whether it be individuals or syndicates become happy don't they, sharing the same as the celebrity status the world brings. Or are they really just in those same hell holes, with the mind forever trying to look for the next escape, the only difference being surrounded by worthless material things in the value of universal being. So i won't beg just give me your money or i will get my Nigerian internet friends just to steal it, or maybe they might just be too busy kidnapping their own children, that's how it works dosen't it, while the rest of the world sits blindly by?
Great, looks like I'm in the running for the £250,000 payout from my close pal Kiwi Gazza will be so grateful - I can see his sad little face now, puckering up to give Kiwi a great big wet
gazza will have to wait 1 more week must have been feeling something else in my bones(Wembley win maybe) lotto not won this week defo next week
Please help kiwi... I'm searching for a generation donation to help me. I'm suffering greatly with a mental health issue and recently embarrassed myself greatly in front of many people. I'm not sure if the condition is treatable but if you give me the funds then i'm sure i can find a way of spending it. My condition is deteriorating rapidly, so haste to transfer the required large donation to my bank account is quickly needed. To assist your judgement with this cause I highlight my great sufferings as follows; Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements) Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions) Requires excessive admiration Has a very strong sense of entitlement, e.g., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations Is exploitative of others, e.g., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends Lacks empathy, e.g., is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her Regularly shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes Or best described as Narcissistic personality disorder. It just all came to a head yesterday evening and i'm now at my wits end. I was playing football and despite my team winning convincingly, I stepped up to score nothing more than a nothing penalty as the game was done. But my traits of great grandeur took over and I acted as though I was the incredible hulk. much love Ronaldo x
