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Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.
My wife thinks that I don't give her enough privacy . . . . at least that’s what she wrote in her diary.
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Or perhaps you’d prefer a nice
But not a French lemonade as it’s
I have posted this before but as there appears to be a theme going, I am sure I can get away with posting it again. It's actually a genuine product in Australia
What do you call a Lesbianbreakup?
I went on a date with a woman whose online profile said she had an "infectious smile".
She had cold sores.
I saw Siamese twins fighting last night.
They ended up bleeding to death after I'd separated them.
Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office:
When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, "Knicker Stitcher, i sew da elastic onto ladies' knickers and thongs."
The clerk looked up Knicker Stitcher on his computer and finding it classified as unskilled labour, he gave him £80 a week unemployment pay.
Mick was next in and when asked his occupation replied. "Diesel Fitter."
Since a diesel fitter was a skilled job, the clerk gave Mick £160 a week.
When Paddy found out he was furious.
He stormed back into the office to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double his pay.
The clerk explained....
"Knicker Stitchers are unskilled labour and Diesel Fitters are skilled labour."
"What skill?" Yelled Paddy.
'I sew da elastic on da knickers and thongs, then Mick puts 'em over his head and says:
"Yep, diesel fitter."
I asked the librarian where the books about engine lubricants were . . . . she said that they were in the non-friction section.
I'm not saying I w*nk a lot but I'm off out to by a Labrador just in case my mam was right.
We were so poor growing up that for breakfast we had ordinary K