Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.

  1. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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  2. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    Watch out Beadle's a sprout.

    beadle.jpg
     
    #12442
  3. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    I’ve got a piece of Christmas decoration stuck in my throat, the doctor said it’s the worst case of tinsilitis that he’s ever seen.
     
    #12443
  4. Snaggey

    Snaggey Well-Known Member

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    #12444
  5. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley, when he spotted a world-
    famous heart surgeon in his shop, who
    was waiting for the service manager to have a look at his bike.

    The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, can I ask you a question?" The famous
    surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle.
    The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and said, "Look at this engine, Doc.
    I can open it up, take valves out, fix'em, put in new parts and when I finish it will work just
    like a new one. H
    ow come I get a pittance and you get the really big money, when you and I are
    doing basically the same work?"

    The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic, "Try doing it
    while it's running."
     
    #12445
  6. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    please log in to view this image
     
    #12446
  7. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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  8. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    please log in to view this image
     
    #12448
  9. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    #12449
  10. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    #12450

  11. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    #12451
  12. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    I was in the dentist's chair when he came home early, caught me with his wife and knocked my teeth out ...

    ... I'm not sure if he was jealous or just drumming up business.
     
    #12452
  13. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    To tell the tooth, it sounds like you deserved filling in, den...ture :emoticon-0105-wink:

    Did the dentist make a good impression ?
     
    #12453
  14. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    Why good grammar matters . . . .
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12454
    Whittylad, Draig and spirit of 73 like this.
  15. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    I thought the noise I heard at the dentist was a fire alarm.

    "Don't worry," he said, "It's just a drill."
     
    #12455
  16. Montysoptician

    Montysoptician Well-Known Member

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  17. rooch 3

    rooch 3 Well-Known Member

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    I’ve heard that the only people who worry about grammar are old blokes who **** themselves to sleep over a comma being in the wrong place.
     
    #12457
    Whittylad and Makemstine Roger like this.
  18. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    I was f*cking a girlfriend in a car on a country lane when there was a tapping at the window.
    I looked up and there was a copper, and he said "Me next"
    A couple of minutes later he tapped again and repeated his comment.
    When I got out of the car I was shaking like a leaf.
    He said there was no need to be nervous.
    So I said "It's alright for you, but I've never f*cked a copper before"
     
    #12458
  19. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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  20. Snaggey

    Snaggey Well-Known Member

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    Have a like....took me bloody ages to get that!!
     
    #12460

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