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Joey Barton - THE Story

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Sir Bobby, May 26, 2011.

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  1. Sir Bobby

    Sir Bobby Active Member

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    It's obvious! Think about it. Joey Barton wants us to do well and in turn for him to do well. I think we've all accepted that we won't be going places until Ashley has gone. So Barton has devised a scheme...

    What could Barton do to affect it you ask? (SPOILER ALERT: if you don't want to know what the future of the club, and in fact the world, is, look away now.)

    He rejects a contract, saying he won't sign under Ashley (or along those lines). This sparks a reaction from the fans, who he realised were on his side all the way after the way he was greeted at the lap of honour.
    In a statement to the fans he says they should by the club. The fans, being devoted to Barton (a la Tash), do as he says, and buy the club (see TJR's article for proof).
    Barton then rises up from player to player-manager, and finally player-manager-owner. He then dictates how we do things on and off the pitch. Then he dictates how every one in Newcastle and the North-East live their lives. Then Britain, then... the world. He's creating a new religion. He IS Jesus.
     
    #1
    Sir Bobby, May 26, 2011
  2. Sanchin0

    Sanchin0 Active Member

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    <laugh>

    Good effort. <ok>
     
    #2
    Sanchin0, May 26, 2011
  3. Cal.

    Cal. Active Member

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    No mention of Tioté. He is Barton's one man army who obliterates all opposition to King Barton.
     
    #3
    Cal., May 26, 2011
  4. Ameobi's Apprentice

    Ameobi's Apprentice Active Member

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    Then he gets crucified and rises from the dead? ...
     
    #4
    Ameobi's Apprentice, May 26, 2011
  5. Aldridge_Prior

    Aldridge_Prior Active Member

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    A bit like Hitler then?
     
    #5
    Aldridge_Prior, May 26, 2011
  6. All Hail Ben Arfa

    All Hail Ben Arfa Member

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    Without a doubt.
     
    #6
    All Hail Ben Arfa, May 26, 2011
  7. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Do we celebrate his resurrection with chocolate eggs still?

    That's my vote swinger.
     
    #7
    overseasTOON, May 26, 2011
  8. Sir Bobby

    Sir Bobby Active Member

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    Or Jesus.
     
    #8
    Sir Bobby, May 26, 2011
  9. beardface

    beardface Active Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #9
    beardface, May 26, 2011
  10. Aldridge_Prior

    Aldridge_Prior Active Member

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    Exactly.
     
    #10
    Aldridge_Prior, May 26, 2011

  11. Donkey Toon

    Donkey Toon Active Member

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    Could we have the Mackems do this? It would help firm up the rivalry ...!
     
    #11
    Donkey Toon, May 26, 2011
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