Joey Barton Explains: With special guest Arsene Wenger

Joey Barton (JB): What ho all and welcome to another exciting edition of ‘Joey Barton Explains’ on Public Access Channel 196. Thanks once again to our sponsors, ‘Little Crouch End Grocers and Ironmongers’ for their continued support and don’t forget; ‘If you need a shovel or some fruit when in Little Crouch End, Little Crouch End Grocers and Ironmongers is the only place to go.’

Before we start I’d like to introduce my guest for the day. To many he’s known as the brains behind Arsenal and it’s with great joy that I welcome him to the show.

Mr Wenger. Arsene. Can I call you Arsene?

Arsene Wenger (AW): People call me Arsene because that is my name. It is a sign of respect to call people by their name. Some may say I am arrogant because I will use the name as a sign of respect but I must have some form of respect or the game will go beyond control. I agree with respect. Respect is good.

JB: Yes. Well. You’re right. Arsene.

AW: I know. I am. As always.

JB: So. Let’s move onto the first question. Today’s question comes from Sid in Sunderland and it says “Dear Joey. As always I’m a massive fan of the show and just want to ask if the Minority Report is a documentary?” So, thoughts Arsene?

AW: I have not seen it.

JB: Oh. OK. Well just to let you know Syd that the Minority Report is in fact a film made by Hollywood and starring Tom Cruise and not in fact a documentary.

AW: It could be viewed as a documentary of mankind’s relationship and imprisonment with technology.

JB: Sorry Arsene? I thought you hadn’t seen it.

AW: I have not.

JB: OK. Second question asks ‘Did the character in Sebastian Faulks novel ‘Birdsong’ actually exist? And that comes from Arnold in Nottingham’. Arsene?

AW: I have not seen this.

JB: *sigh* OK. Well Arnold. It would be naïve to assume that it was but it’s more than likely an amalgamation of several stories roled into a character.

AW: He was real. I know this.

JB: But…. You’ve said you haven’t read this…

AW: I have not.

JB: So why do you say he was real?

AW: He is.

JB: You can’t just say you haven’t seen something and change your mind.

AW: When?

JB: Just then!

AW: I’m unaware of that.

JB:: You’ve done it again!

AW: I am being unfairly criticised.

JB: But you change your mind to suit your needs. It’s not right.

AW: I think you should show me respect and perhaps tackle easier questions.

JB: They weren’t tough questions! Surely you can see that.

AW: I ask you. Why is the renminbi causing issues with international currency valuations?

JB: I erm… I don’t know. That’s a tough question you’ve given me there.

AW: That was not a hard question. It was a fair question.

JB: OK. OK. That’s it for tonight… Erm, thanks to Arsene and good night one and all until next week.

 

Sorry couldn't read this suffering from Wenger Vision, it's all blurry and causes a lack of perspective.

 

Haha Brillant OT!

 

Hahaha, brilliant!!!

 

Sorry OT, didn't see your thread - but without doubt your thread is a disgrace and deserves one star. This is typical of how threads are destroying not606. Threads have no place in football forums. It is about time the moderators started protecting skillful writers by banning threads. But my opinion is not important. I did not see the thread. Having not seen it this thread is clearly part of a larger conspiracy against me, but as I have said my opinion is not important.

 

I'm certain Interpol will be investigating this article. It said so on French telly.

 

Wenger has just told SkySports that following his interview with Joey Barton , he feels that the way the questions were tackled was completely over the top and Barton should be given a three match ban.