some of you may remember the **** on the doorstep incident of a few months back. The student burd was sent out to weed the plant pots and came running back in straight away. Apparently someone has shat in one of the flowerpots outside the office. The plot thckens, who is the mystery ****ter? how many more times will she pick up ****es she finds outside before she realises thats not her job?
i had a pal who kept getting stopped skateboarding because of a cctv camera the polis kept coming and telling him to **** off. rather than move to a different spot he took matters in to his own hsnds. One day he climbed on to the roof of the carpark it was on and got someone to hold his hands as he squated over the edge and shat on the camera. my favourite part of the story is the fact that he brought a roll of bog paper with him so he could wipe. clearly spent time planning the operation. he claims a direct hit, its unverified but for the sake of the story we will say his aim was good.
I've shat outside, I was drunk though. Was out in the toon and was bursting, so found a wee dark corner and shat away. Even got my mate to go get me a few napkins out the kebab shop across the road so I could wipe.
this reminded me of another guy i used to know. we were ****ing about next to some abandond housing and he needed a **** so we broke in looking for a toilet. he went searching for something to wipe on and came back with a handfull of fibre glass insulation. I have never heard screams like it in my life.
Here, whats the script with ****s wiping their arse while still sitting on the pan? Hows that even possible?
If ye stand up yer buttocks close and ye canny clean yer arse properly ya durty bastard. Unless ye stand there like John Wayne in a crouching position.
