In peace....

Joey Barton 'based personality on Swayze in Road House'
16-05-12
FOOTBALLER Joey Barton has confessed to stealing his philosophising tough guy persona from the lead character in the 1989 movie Road House.

The film, regarded as a cult classic, stars Swayze as a professional nightclub bouncer and is famous for lines including ‘Nobody ever wins a fight,’ and ‘Be nice until it’s time not to be nice’.

QPR player Barton apparently saw the film on Channel 5 while at the Sporting Chance clinic and realised he could belt as many people as he liked if he came out with a few supposedly deep statements in between.

He said: “It started at City when I got a red card and told the lads, ‘Take the biggest guy in the world, shatter his knee and he’ll drop like a stone.’

“I thought they’d know it from the film, but Stuart Pearce nodded slowly like I’d said something really wise and I realised I could get away with this.

“You should have seen Alan Shearer’s face when I said ‘I used to **** guys like you in prison’. Although thinking back on it I’m not sure whether that was anger or mild arousal.”

QPR manager Mark Hughes said: “Like most men, the only Patrick Swayze film I’ve seen is Point Break so I thought Joey was quoting proper philosophers like Plato and Decartes.

“The news is going to hit DJ Campbell the hardest, though. He’s just had Marcus Aurelius saying ‘Pain don’t hurt’ tattooed on his leg.”

 

Oh dear!

 

Look forward to reading rebel's take on this and other recent incidents in his much missed spoofs; apart from this subject, don't think he'll be short on material from the season just gone.

 

So he'll be saying "When seagulls follow ze trawler, it is because zey think sardines will be thrown in the sea" next...