Hull City Jokes Thread

Hello lads. Post your best jokes up here


I typed 'Hell' instead of 'Hull' into my Sat-Nav.

I still got there.

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Hull City striker Marlon King has been released on bail following his arrest for sexually assaulting a woman in the red light district.

So, it's not true: he can score in a brothel.

 

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Hull City.

Hull City who?

Hull City Association Football Club.




Big lols.

 

What's the difference between Liverpool and a bucket of ****?

The bucket.

 

What will you get when Hull City are relegated?
10,000 more Chelsea fans.

 

Watching the Hull vs Man U game and surprised at the players Hull have bought.
Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink
How did they attract a big name like that?

 

That's not a joke, it's the truth! Sad but true.

 

Liverpool.

 

Q: What do bellends call themselves on internet forums?

A: 'cant buy class or players'

 

.

 

Shouldn't you and your dad be playing rugby?

 

People from Hull speak with a distinctive accent which can make certain expressions ambiguous.

For instance, 'half hearted' can mean 'lacking enthusiasm' or 'I have just broken wind'.

 

Your material is almost as old as that there tin of premier league trophy polish at Anfield.

 

How can a scouser take the piss out of a Yorkshire accent?

 

9. Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an intelligent Liverpool supporter, and an old drunk are walking down the street together when simultaneously they each spot a fifty quid note. Who gets it?

A: The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythical creatures.

 

75% of 14 year old girls in liverpool admit to regularly going out binge drinking. who the hell is looking after their kids?

 

St. Peter was manning the Pearly Gates when 40 Liverpool fans showed up. Never having seen anyone from Liverpool at heaven's door, St. Peter said he would have to check with God. After hearing the news, God instructed him to admit the 10 most virtuous from the group.

A few minutes later, Saint Peter returned to God breathless and said, "They're gone."
"What? All of the Liverpool fans are gone?" asked God.

"No" replied Saint Peter "The Pearly Gates!"

 

Push off ****, you're not welcome, not funny & if scouse, not human.

 

Dey do do dat dough don't dey dough.

 

What's the difference between a cow and a tragedy?

A scouser wouldn't know how to milk a cow.

 

Liverpool airport has been shut for the past 8 hours due to a "Suspicious car".

Apparently it had tax and insurance and the radio was still in it.