How to be a Leeds fan

Stage one -
Predict that Leeds will win all their remaining games, no matter how many are left.

Stage two -
Complain that Leeds are better than everyone else and only bad luck has denied them their rightful crown. (Extra points for calling all Norwichs late goals lucky)

Stage three -
Hypothesize that if Leeds had won games they hadn't or scored goals they didn't how far ahead they would be by now. (And how unfair it is that they didn't)

Stage four -
Mention how big a club Leeds are, and how they 'deserve' to be in the premier league because of some good football that was played by some Leeds players decades ago. Call everyone else a tinpot club. Suggest everyone is twice as good when playing Leeds due to, well you know, the prestige of playing Leeds.

Stage five -
Win a game of football. Proceed to do all the above in overdrive. Predict that the next game will be a masterful display of Leeds at their finest and a goal fest.

Stage six -
Lose game to poor opposition.

Stage seven -
BURN IT ALL DOWN. Slag off the players. Slag off the manager. Predict Armageddon. Pull out hair at how only Leeds could be so cruelly abused by the evil machinations of fate.

Stage eight -
Slowly transition back into stage one over course of 48 hrs.


(Watching Leeds fans react to this run in has been a bizarre anthropological study )

 

I would not be too hasty in giving them bird if I were you - their last three games on paper look easier than ours (as does Sheffield United’s) and it would be foolish to think the season is all wrapped up right now. As yesterday’s results show anything at all can happen.

 

Brilliant instruction maual for being a Leeds fan, bengalurucanary!

Well, you would also think that leading 1-0 against 10 men at home would be a pushover unless of course you're Leeds for whom the machinations of fate result in a 1-2 loss.

 

As I say Rick, on paper their games look winnable, but so did Wigan (h). I won’t write off them or Sheffield until we have secured the 4 points we need to go up.

 

What about if we win on Monday and one or the other fails to win?

 

Stage 1-8 fast track method
Be a vile Yorkshirecunt

 

Yep - that’d do it.

 

Oh I don't suggest any outcome to the season, just noting how Leeds fans have reacted to it so far. I don't think I've ever seen fans be so bipolar in their judgement of their own club and it's fortunes from minute to minute. Strange contrast to the relative calm of Norwich fans currently.

 

For stage 5, you could add the "Champions League within 2 years" claim that gets a LUFC workout following a win... Stuff like this :

 

So bored of Leeds fans. I have never seen so many pathetic, whingy, self righteous a*seholes.

I saw a tweet again today how Norwich are the luckiest "C's" ever coz we scored in injury time again. I don't see Norwich fans raging on Leeds every game no matter the score, result or performance. Leeds fluke a win through refs just handing them everything. We say nothing. We batter a team, then rely on a last minute goal despite the officials. Then here come the Leeds fans.

I reminded him Reading equalised in Injury time, that was over the stated injury time.

He didn't respond. I'm guessing Norwich weren't lucky that day. I'm guessing he'd still say we were lucky the ref didn't gift them a double goal...Or something.

He obviously has not watched a single game. If he had, and seen all our ref decisions. He wouldn't be calling us lucky.

Let's not confuse things by actually knowing about what you are moaning about.

 

That is one of the funniest things I've read, brilliant & accurate too.

 

Holy **** talk about delusional

 

Where is the line between mocking stupid people, and not making fun of "special" people?

 

Stage 9 -
Fall apart again. Lament how sad it is that you will be in the playoffs and how the teams above you will add nothing to the premier league while Leeds would have set it alight.

Stage 10 -
Start discussing who you'll face at Wembley, and booking the Travel Lodge. Because of course you'll make the final. You're the almighty Leeds. You're massive.

 

You could add that one or two are even already talking about booking a hotel in the Wembley area for the nights either side of the play-off Final...

 

Hope you don't mind me butting in, but the Leeds thing reminds me of a story my grandfather told me about a bus ride he had with a Leeds fan in May 1927. The Leeds fan went through every game that had been played by Leeds in the 1926/27 season (see point three above). Every goal that should have been scored was described. Why conceded goals were lucky, off-side, allowed because the ref was blind, or totally against the run of play were vividly recounted. All the misfortune that could befall a team happened to Leeds. At the end of this seaon's review my grandfather said to the Leeds fan, "By the sound of it you should have been champions, rather than relegated."

They have always been like this, it seems.

 

Ser - gi - oh,
Sergi Sergi Canos.
He wasn't quite good enough for us,
But he's knocked the wheels off Leed's bus
Good old Sergi Canos.

 

Wow Bielsa getting in on the action too.

'Obviously it was not our destiny to finish in the top two. We have needed twice as many opportunities to score a goal as other teams (at the top of the table) but you can't say to a team that has had all those chances that they did not deserve to win."

Surely he doesn't believe that, this has to be pandering to the fans. Bielsa is a supposed technical genius. I think he knows that the only metric on which wins are decided is goals scored. Surely he knows this

 

My 'insurance policy' that I took out in January was to book a room at the Watford Premier Inn for £55 for May 27th. (Travelodge - cheapskate!!! ).
I'm HOPING after tonight's result I can offer it on eBay!!?