Emile Heskey showed up to Elland Road with a backpack on, as he was entering the security stopped him and questioned him. "Stop right there pal, what's in the bag?"
So Heskey answers "Some porn dvds, fake tickets, a few counterfeit shirts, counterfeit money, a load of heroin and a gun".
The security guard replies "thank **** for that. I thought you'd brought your boots."