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Here’s To You

Discussion in 'The Premier League' started by Stan, Nov 17, 2017.

  1. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    Mrs Robinson.

    So who are the granny shaggers here?

    Post your tale and then nominate someone else to tell their’s.

    Ayia Napa, summer of 1993. I was 17, she was a Welsh hairdresser with massive norks. I told her I was 21, she said she was 31. I know that I was lying, I’m fairly certain she was as well. I’d say she was more like 35.

    Not for the first or last time, I had that, “where the **** am I and how the **** am I going to get home” thought when I crept out of her ****e holiday apartment.

    I nominate @luvgonzo because he’s Welsh and @The Liebherr Legacy because I reckon he dreams of being a hairdresser. Also @Commachio as he’s bound to have some filthy story to share with the support group.
     
    #1
  2. luvgonzo

    luvgonzo Pisshead

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    In some party for my friend parents I was 17 got a BJ from some random bird of about 45 not good looking at all but she just grabbed hold of it and asked and I though **** it go on then.
     
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  3. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    Nominate.
     
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  4. luvgonzo

    luvgonzo Pisshead

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    @Skylarker

    This will be good. <laugh>
     
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  5. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    Also when I was 17/18, my mate had a party at his parents’ house.

    We found a girl we’d been at school with sucking off the dad outside. The mum was in the house at the time and was a bit pissed off.

    The next weekend my mate got a blow job off the same girl.

    She was a proper dog.

    As an aside, the dad once caught me in their house sucking his daughter’s tits. I was seeing her best mate Carol at the time. What did her dad say when he found some horny teenager going to town on his daughter? “What about Carol?”
     
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  6. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    We may need to create a new part of the internet.
     
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  7. Skylarker

    Skylarker PL High Commissioner

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    Not sure which example to use, plus I'm at work - I'll return later <ok>
     
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  8. Bodinki

    Bodinki You're welcome
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    <laugh>
    This sounds like it will be good.
    If its anything like the chick on the train it should be good.
    And I totally would have wrecked that chick, based on the pic you posted <ok>
     
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  9. Skylarker

    Skylarker PL High Commissioner

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    She looked better in real life tbf, and was wearing slutty knee high socks and a very short skirt...

    Sometimes I regret deleting her number <laugh>
     
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  10. Libby

    Libby 9-0

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    Hairdresser <rofl>

    Never really shagged an older bird. Oldest was probably 30 when I was 19, still had a funny moment where I was trashing it and she said '****ing hell! How old are you again?' and I replied '14' <laugh>

    Other than that when I was 18 I got a blowwy off my mates mrs pisshead mum who was about 40.

    She was ****ing minging with dodgy teeth.

    Nominate @Tobes and @Safc83
     
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  11. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Done @Matth_2014 's mum behind the co-op, I was 11

    Number 11
     
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  12. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    Harsh.

    You weren’t nominated!
     
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  13. Bodinki

    Bodinki You're welcome
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    Waiting for Matth to come on here and start actually trying to refute your allegation <laugh>
     
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  14. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    I nominate @Sweats.

    Reckon there’s loads.
     
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  15. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    You'll get over it I'm sure Stan
     
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  16. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    Maybe.
     
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  17. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Two spring straight to my mind.

    The first one was about July, this year. Buying a house off a woman well into her 60's. The mortgage valuation came back a couple of grand less than the offer the old lady accepted. I had to make the difference up out of my own pocket, which I really didn't want to do. I went round to see her to come to an arrangement. To cut a long story short, I gave her what she wanted :emoticon-0119-puke: and I walked away with the price, I wanted. She had the smelliest fanny you can imagine. She was ****ing ugly too and very little teeth. No ****.

    The second one happened on 28/03/2003. I remember it so vividly because it was the night of my old man's funeral. I went to my mates who lived around the corner and had a few drinks before he announced he was going to the monkey (rave), we were only 19 at the time and that was our thing. I didn't want to go and stayed to finish off my can which wasn't unusual. When he left his mam kept cuddling me asking if I was alright and then when she pulled back from one cuddle we kissed and I ended up doing her on the settee. She had the first pair of foster tits that I had ever encountered and I can remember being mesmerised by them. They were lush, big and firm. She was pure filth, after I had finished (didn't last long) she mustn't have realised cos she turned round and casually told me I could stick it up her arse now. Devastating doesn't come close. She was a very good looking woman. I was 19 and she was 40. I also recall her telling me she fancied me from the first time she seen me. I had known her for 8 years :emoticon-0112-wonde
     
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  18. Stan

    Stan Stalker

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    Mate, if you’d said something at the time we could have had a whip round.
     
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  19. Bodinki

    Bodinki You're welcome
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    So she wanted to **** you when you were 11?

    please log in to view this image
     
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  20. Sweats

    Sweats Fat lives matter
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    Didn't get a notification on this..

    Not really shagged anyone a lot older than me..

    Did shag the lettings manager about 12 years ago she was a good 20 years older than me and smoked weed..

    She made me get stoned and all I could focus on were the wrinkles round her mouth instantly got the droop and left.
     
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