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Halloween

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Gutierrez's Right Boot, Oct 31, 2011.

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  1. Gutierrez's Right Boot

    Gutierrez's Right Boot Well-Known Member

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    Right after the whole 5-1 :grin::grin::grin:

    Now im hoping to be able to watch the match in peace. If any trick or treaters come between the time of 8 and 945 expect trouble.

    Problem is cant think of anything to do my last idea has run it course. Blasting the opening of ONE by Metallica out of my bedroom window watching kids scream under machine gun fire
     
    #1
    Gutierrez's Right Boot, Oct 31, 2011
  2. Jock McMagpie

    Jock McMagpie Active Member

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    I have just realised that snotty nosed little kids with **** jokes are going to come and bug my happiness when the game is on tonight. Juts need to let the missus deal with them and head to the boozer!!! <ok> (any excuse)
     
    #2
    Jock McMagpie, Oct 31, 2011
  3. simonbh7

    simonbh7 Active Member

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    Pouring a cold bucket of piss on them from the 1st floor window normally does the trick.
     
    #3
    simonbh7, Oct 31, 2011
  4. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Wont be knocking on your door tonight then.
     
    #4
    Agent Bruce, Oct 31, 2011
  5. Samuel L Ameobi

    Samuel L Ameobi Active Member

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    Play Fleetwood Mac's 'Rumors' continuously.

    please log in to view this image
     
    #5
    Samuel L Ameobi, Oct 31, 2011
  6. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Add 'The Fritzls' to your front door with a sign directing trick or treaters to the basement door.
     
    #6
    overseasTOON, Oct 31, 2011
  7. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Just been making a cd with some Fleetwood Mac on.
     
    #7
    Agent Bruce, Oct 31, 2011
  8. Mod Face

    Mod Face Well-Known Member

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    Stick an outwards-facing drawing pin on your doorbell, smear your front door with faeces and replace your front windows with stunt glass.

    Kid rings the doorbell - pricked finger
    Kid knocks on the door - ****ty knuckles
    Kid then knocks on the window - window shatters and you get them done for criminal damage

    Replace the windows after use.

    The next morning you can then hose down your door, remove the pin and reinstall your proper windows. <ok>
     
    #8
    Mod Face, Oct 31, 2011
  9. Samuel L Ameobi

    Samuel L Ameobi Active Member

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    <diva>
     
    #9
    Samuel L Ameobi, Oct 31, 2011
  10. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Mainly Led Zep though.
     
    #10
    Agent Bruce, Oct 31, 2011

  11. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Start a rumour that passing through your front door will lead to the not-so-magical-land of Sunderland... This should put all good geordie children off tonight...

    Furthermore, if you ever need to discipline your kids, there's no better cure than the Brucey-man... Mackem children are given a similar story around christmas time to aid obedience, along the lines of "be good or the Brucey-man will put another lump of **** in your favourite team in the january transfer window"...
     
    #11
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Oct 31, 2011
  12. Ameobi's Apprentice

    Ameobi's Apprentice Active Member

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    Just go to the window and tell them nobody is in, that should send them on their way.
     
    #12
    Ameobi's Apprentice, Oct 31, 2011
  13. Mod Face

    Mod Face Well-Known Member

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    Get yourself of the registered sex offenders list, job done. :)
     
    #13
    Mod Face, Oct 31, 2011
  14. Ameobi's Apprentice

    Ameobi's Apprentice Active Member

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    How would they know he was on it though? Would he have to put signs up outside of his house warning people of his naughty ways?
     
    #14
    Ameobi's Apprentice, Oct 31, 2011
  15. DuD

    DuD Active Member

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    I remember when I went trick or treating when I was younger.

    We rang on someone's flat and they opened the window and started pelting sweets off us from the top floor. <laugh>
     
    #15
    DuD, Oct 31, 2011
  16. AH

    AH Active Member

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    Rumours is a fantastic album, if these kids have any decent sense of music they will be flocking to your doors!


    If we get any trick or treaters they will be treated in the same way as anyone else who comes to our door....

    ...ignored, whilst we hide and cower in our kitchen. Scares me when people come to the door..
     
    #16
    AH, Oct 31, 2011
  17. biggeordiedave

    biggeordiedave Active Member

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    And then you get to spend all of tomorrow peeling hard, dried egg off all your windows.
     
    #17
    biggeordiedave, Oct 31, 2011
  18. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Dress up as Cameo

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    Everything apart from the red cod piece is optional.
     
    #18
    overseasTOON, Oct 31, 2011
  19. 5 Goals 1 Hat Trick 11 Heroes-NUFC4LIFE

    5 Goals 1 Hat Trick 11 Heroes-NUFC4LIFE Well-Known Member

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    They will be in for a world of hell if they knock on my door whilst we're losing.
     
    #19
    5 Goals 1 Hat Trick 11 Heroes-NUFC4LIFE, Oct 31, 2011
  20. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Don't think they'd travel that far for a few sweets 5 Goals.
     
    #20
    Agent Bruce, Oct 31, 2011
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