OK it's a slow Tuesday afternoon and everyone is bored so please post all your favourite horse racing euphemisms on this thread for a laugh. I'll start with a few: "More plots than an Agatha Christie novel" - copyright Sir Barney Chuckles "Hosed up" "Sluiced up" "Bolted up" "Won as it liked" "Won with its head in its chest" "Swinging away on the bit" "Breezes into the lead" - Stuart Machin (I think) "Strung out like washing" I'm sure there are many more out there .................
"...made a pleasing debut without being knocked about" is merely a euphemism for schooling in public and running a non trier..
"wouldn't get round in a horse box!" "it's absolutely hacked up!" Cheltenham reference........"Bouncing up the hill!" "He's got a double handful" John Francome's quote in the parade ring before the Chelts GC 2010, when referring to Halcon Generaladis "This horse would have won the Gold Cup last had the Paul Nicholls horse box broken down..." referring to the previous years GC 1-2-3 for Paul Nicholls.
OddDog: Above are really very good. Posted following Punter's Glossary (by David Ashforth) a few years back on old 606. A few of them might be worth a repeat: The Punter's Glossary: Accumulator: Bet requiring punter to make additional selections until one loses. Ante-Post: Special arrangement under which punters are allowed to lose their money six months before the race has started. Any-to-come: No. Betting Shop: Place for depositing your money. In that respect, similar to a bank. Bookmaker: Wealthy victim of repeated misfortune. Double: Bet based on the erroneous conviction that it is possible to pick more than one winner in the same afternoon. Dual Forecast: Bet involving two selections. A and B, in which A finishes first and B third, or B finishes first and A third. Each-way: Opportunity to lose twice in one bet. Favourite: Horse held in high regard by the bookmakers. Form book: Historical work, useful for predicting what will happen in the past. Good thing: Losing horse. Horse: Magnificent creature with no sense of justice. Inspection: Examination of course to see whether it is fit for you to lose your money on. Jockey: Small person employed by trainer to ruin your win double. Jockey Club: High-class mortuary. Off: Term used to describe a horse's eighth run of the season. Punter: Person with no money. Racecourse: Place for seeing, at first hand, where things go wrong. Starter: Official who drops a flag to indicate that hope has ended and experience is about to begin. Trainer: Keeper of domestic animals. Unlucky: Horses that took part in a race but did not win it. Winning Post: Wooden stick inserted in the ground in the wrong place. Excerpt from "Hitting The Turf - A Punting Life" by David Ashforth. Great little book, recommend it to all not606 horseracing fans.
I'm surprised one of the most used, especially on Channel 4, hasn't cropped up "Stays longer than the mother-in-law"
Actually, given a definition of euphemism: " the deliberate or polite use of a pleasant or neutral word or expression to avoid the emotional implications of a plain term" I suppose my one doesn't really qualify.
Who can forget the Jimmy Lindley perennial phrase; "...he must have inside him a heart as big as his self (sic)"..or indeed Sir Peter O'Sullevan remarking on a poor leap with the enduring soundbite "none too clever at that one" Also remember GG referring to those behind Rainbow Quest in the Coronation Cup as being like "whirling derverishes". Must be many more.
Its Jumping like a stag Always been a favourite of mine (used even when Monet/Master Minded clatters through one)
As some of the above euphemisms are in fact metaphors, similies or simple ironic understatement I'd like to add, "the favourite's got a lot of work to do if he's going to win from there", which invariably means you've done your money on the jolly.
Won in a canter! Hard held Jumped them into the ground- watch a rerun of the Women's 3000m Steeplechase at the World Championships.What a magnificent front running performance from the Russian- with the best jumping I have ever seen from a human steeplechaser- man or woman!
Couldn't run out of sight on a dark night. Backed off the map. Gone via the cape. (Planted deep in running.) Coat tugger. (Someone who tips a horse then wants a percentage of the winnings.) Emu. (Someone who picks up discarded tickets, looking for a live ticket. Often seen when after protest is lodged.) Gelding. (RedDeer.) London to a brick on. Went faster than last weeks pay.
"Gelding. (RedDeer.)" Cyclonic: Well, might as well be........but I did sire a wonderful daughter, so that knocks that in the hat. She is lumbered with a few of her 'orrible Dad's bad traits, but she's mostly like her Mum, thank God!
Reminds me of the episode of Blackadder (from Series 3 where he is the butler to the Prince). They have Dr Johnson visiting with his new-fangled "Dictionary" and Blackadder is winding him up by using really long words which he has made up: Dr. Samuel Johnson: [places two manuscripts on the table, but picks up the top one] Here it is, sir. The very cornerstone of English scholarship. This book, sir, contains every word in our beloved language. Blackadder: Every single one, sir? Dr. Samuel Johnson: Every single word, sir! Blackadder: Oh, well, in that case, sir, I hope you will not object if I also offer the Doctor my most enthusiastic contrafribularities. Dr. Samuel Johnson: What? Blackadder: "Contrafribularites", sir? It is a common word down our way. Dr. Samuel Johnson: Damn! [writes in the book] Blackadder: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I'm anispeptic, frasmotic, even compunctuous to have caused you such pericombobulation.
