Three female Teds die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, 'We only have one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks!' So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first Tedette accidentally steps on one. Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, 'your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!' The next day, the second female 82er steps accidentally on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman. The third Ted-girl has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, very careful where she steps. She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St.Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on. Very tall, long eyelashes, muscular. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word. The happy Tedette says, 'I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?' The guy says "I don't know about you but I stepped on a duck"
I was playing Football Manager on my PC when I was offered the City job. I knew it was a poor squad with no future, so I declined the offer. I then put the phone down and got back to Football Manager.
