http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport/sport-headlines/drogba-returns-to-chelsea-to-die-2014072888964 Drogba returns to Chelsea to die Striker Didier Drogba is dragging himself back to Stamford Bridge to end his days, the club has confirmed. The player, who enjoyed his glory years at Chelsea, has somehow sensed his own forthcoming demise and is limping thousands of miles to die in the place that loved him best. Sport scientist Denys Finch Hatton said: âItâs an extraordinary natural phenomenon. âThese creatures, magnificent in their prime, use some rudimentary homing instinct to find their way through a baffling maze of contracts to live out their last moments showered with applause from fans. âItâs almost as if theyâre intelligent.â Other footballers who have made the same journey include Henrik Larsson, whose bones lie in the 30 yard box at Helsingborg and still contribute the occasional assist. Drogba, who is currently leading a herd of international footballers across the Asian steppes, is expected to arrive for Chelseaâs first game of the season. He will walk slowly onto the pitch, commit a last two-footed career-threatening tackle, then die when an opposing player retaliates to win his team one final penalty. Jose Mourinho said: âIt will be a majestic sight. âUnlike Frank Lampard, who has travelled to New York to live out his final days in complete anonymity and will die there, alone and forgotten, in a back alley.â
"Where as some creatures will never leave the place they are born, and will instead choose to stay in their original nest, not only dying, but preventing the younger, more able members of their family from achieving anything and poisoning their original environment as it is forced to adapt to the OAP specimen whilst the nest slips into obscurity"
I'd like to congratulate the Chelsea board on noticing the link to the Daily Mash and taking the thread in good humour, I post these things now and then but some posters on other boards seem to miss the obvious link to the website and actually think I'm a wum. My copy & paste abilities are second to none and in time my genius will be recognised. For now those people will remain nameless in order to spare their feelings as I wouldn't want other people to think they are stupid. http://www.not606.com/showthread.php/271028-Van-Gaal-demands-players-adopt-his-hairstyle
Irony is often mistaken for wumming on many boards, better to use words of 1 syllable or less to stay out of trouble. Always a place for humour, especially when things are going badly !!
Gonzo - I liked your copy /paste efforts. However, would like your pool based copy/paste efforts more than anything taste of his own medicine
