Dirty bastard

The **** that sits across from me in work has just turned up reeking of booze saying he was out celebrating Celtic signing Keane last night. He's wearing an Ireland top and got a tri colour in his pocket Never went home last night and says he can't remember where he slept last night He's not shut up about Keane and is saying he can't wait to see him in the Champs League next season in the hoops What a ****ing moron

 

has his arse been violated?

 

Oh my ****ing god. Some right roasters out there.

 

It probably has been. He can't sit still, constant wriggling in his seat.

The boss hasn't seen him yet I can't wait for him to come round and see the state he's in.

The guys not been to a game in years and knows **** all about football. I asked him to name me the best Celtic 11 and he struggled to even name enough players Hate ****s like him

 

some if's and but's there... i mean he's assuming Celtic will get through the CL qualifiers

 

With the way he's dressed, he really should go home

 

He thinks they signed him permanently, not just on loan

He thinks it's a given they will win the league

I just asked him what he thinks the score will be tonight and he didn't know they were playing

 

some stiff competition for the post of office jakey there magic.

 

Tell me about it dougie. He's wins office moron title hands down I'm even wearing a tie today for the first time in years

 

i ****ing hate ties. we have to wear them even though i cant remember the last time i met a client.

 

Can't beat the ****-wit from Dundee who came out here wearing a four-year old Celtic away top with "Tiocfaidh ár lá" on the back of it.

He was in the OIM's office within a day. ****ing moron.

 

I dont mind wearing a tie, but I always wear it loose because am a trendy bastard.

My prefered style is no tie with my top 2 buttons undone to reveal a glimpse of my impressive chest. Gets the ladies moist.

 

I wore a tie when I started, but 5 years down the line I couldn't give a ****. Now it's only for when I have meetings.

I got a pair of tartan trousers last week, considering wearing them tomorrow

 

Bi-Bi Baby

 

dont do it

 

I was out in them last weekend

My brother called me a bay city roller He calls me QI as well. Apparently when my hair curls I look like Alan Davies

 

i thought it might have been because your a big gay like stephen fry

 

Good one

Maybe thats the real reason

 

ever been up Jonathons Creek ?

 

Aye girvan, the jeremy kyle episode should be shown next week. Watch for the Alan Davies lookalike in tartan trousers

The ****s been sent home. Boss was raging. He went bright red and vented his spleen at him for 5 minutes constant I was trying not to laugh