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Breaking News!!!!

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner, Sep 25, 2011.

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  1. I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner

    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner Well-Known Member

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    There is huge breaking news coming out of SJP tonight, due to be discussed in the coming days, that NUFC have found the grass at St James' Park!

    The players, employee's of Mike Ashley and Newcastle United, have managed to stunningly connect the ball with the grass, something which hasn't been seen at SJP in years.

    For years, the skill to do so has been missing(someone threw out the piece of paper) but a new theory has been drawn up. The theory states that if you play the ball on the ground, keeping the ball and finding the pass then you are likely to look better and get better results.

    This theory was proved against Blackburn Rovers at St James' Park where the ball was played along the grass(the big green thing that we all stare at) and it ripped Blackburn apart. Blackburn returned to Lancashire with a newly torn arsehole, as NUFC provided them with a new one.

    So, as you will discover in the coming days as it will be discussed none stop, NUFC indeed have found the grass, and the theory that the ball is scared of the grass has indeed proven to be bollocks!
     
    #1
    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner, Sep 25, 2011
  2. Tim Kruls Zulu Shield (:)

    Tim Kruls Zulu Shield (:) Active Member

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    love your signiture
     
    #2
    Tim Kruls Zulu Shield (:), Sep 25, 2011
  3. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    I knew there was some grass somewhere, where did they find it?

    As for Blackburn going back to Lancashire with a new arsehole, do you think Ashley will start supplying new ones to people who suffer with piles?
     
    #3
    Agent Bruce, Sep 25, 2011
  4. Minty Fresh

    Minty Fresh Active Member

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    Although we were against a very poor side I was LOVING some of the stuff we played today. For example when Colloccini got it at our own corner flag and Yakubu was putting him under pressure. We could have just hoofed it. But instead we played one touch passing and the ball worked it's way up the line through Collo then Raylor then Tiote then Jonas then Ba who was fouled.

    I think having a centre-back who is so composed on the ball (Collo) helps a lot.
     
    #4
    Minty Fresh, Sep 25, 2011
  5. I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner

    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner Well-Known Member

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    Agree, and the fact that he is captain helps a lot!
     
    #5
    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner, Sep 25, 2011
  6. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    He's been nothing short of brilliant so far this season.
     
    #6
    Agent Bruce, Sep 25, 2011
  7. I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner

    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner Well-Known Member

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    Agree, give me a ring sometime AB please.
     
    #7
    I Sit Next To A Badger-Leazes Corner, Sep 25, 2011
  8. The Secret Ingredient

    The Secret Ingredient Well-Known Member

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    it's great to see it again i'm loving the direction our style of play is going and as i've said before this isn't even our best 11 good times <party>
     
    #8
    The Secret Ingredient, Sep 25, 2011
  9. Crouching Shola Hidden Talent

    Crouching Shola Hidden Talent Active Member

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    Colo is slowly becoming our version of Puyol! But of course Colo is better.
     
    #9
    Crouching Shola Hidden Talent, Sep 25, 2011
  10. Jock McMagpie

    Jock McMagpie Active Member

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    we were great today.....get out of our club.....get out of our club.....oh wait!!!! were doing all right!!!! better than alrite!!!
     
    #10
    Jock McMagpie, Sep 25, 2011

  11. Cal.

    Cal. Active Member

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    As soon as we lose a game the cockney mafia out brigade will probably return...
     
    #11
    Cal., Sep 25, 2011
  12. Darth Gogledd

    Darth Gogledd Well-Known Member

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    Both of them are (Collo and Saylor), it's just Willo who isn't.
     
    #12
    Darth Gogledd, Sep 25, 2011
  13. Mr Wonderful

    Mr Wonderful Active Member

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    decent thread and yes we have always been better when playing passing football, Colo will be a legend.
     
    #13
    Mr Wonderful, Sep 25, 2011
  14. Jonnyaiston

    Jonnyaiston Well-Known Member

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    My favourite move had to be just as Ben Arfa came on, the passing was great, just a shame there was a great tackle to stop best scoring.
     
    #14
    Jonnyaiston, Sep 25, 2011
  15. Jesus Was A Geordie

    Jesus Was A Geordie Well-Known Member

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    Agree entirely, perfect example of Colo's composure was when he dummied playing the ball with his left foot, dragged it back, shifting it to his right foot and tried to push it out wide before he was fouled - A striker would've been proud of that control!

    Leazes, good article and again, agree entirely - Pardew seems to really buy into the pretty football philosophy and SO much credit should go to Carr, what a buy Cabaye has been, HE is what Gullet meant when he said sexy football!
     
    #15
    Jesus Was A Geordie, Sep 25, 2011
  16. biggeordiedave

    biggeordiedave Active Member

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    I just like the fact that we play in the first half now, instead of being utter **** for 45 minutes, then only starting to play after half time.
     
    #16
    biggeordiedave, Sep 25, 2011
  17. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image




    Hey....I've told you before, keep of the grass ya twat.
     
    #17
    jimileysbaldhead, Sep 25, 2011
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