Here's hoping these Indian lads impress in their trial this week and Rangers are the first Scottish team to bring in players from the Indian league. They could turn out to be duds or the move might not even happen but they deserve a chance if they can be snapped up for next to nothing.
I hope they don't bring their Timish cookbook with them. I heard one of them makes a cracking Anton Rogan Josh.
I'm not sure I agree with all these Indian players coming to Scotland. Cumin over here, tikka our jobs.
One of them worked his way up from being a cloakroom attendant ... Think he's called Mahatma Macoat ... The other cooks his curries in a Microwave, he's called Pa'ting! His cousin worked in a Swimming Pool - Handya Bandin!
Aloo, Aloo Youâll know us by our noise Weâre up to our knees in ghee ya fud Jalahndar or youâll die Kashmir for the Bombay bully boys (Can also be sung as a round.) Donât even start, okay? I was originally going to say something about how you could relax, Tarquin, as these boys are total and Uttar Pradeshtants, loyal through and through â so Iâm thinking you should be comparatively grateful that I took it upon myself to finish your song, instead.
Let's not mention the one that never made it over for the trial. He was arrested on suspicion of rape just before he due to fly out. His name is Ramit Bawdeep.
I feel encouraged to continue by the sincerity of your support, ya Raj. No, no Pope of Rome* Chapatis do sadden my eyes No naans and no teas and no roti puri Every day is the 12th of July** * May need altered. Might offend some people. **12th July, 1932: the 16,000-foot Shyok ice dam in the Himalayas bursts, flooding the Indus Valley at Kashmir, in my opinion.
