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Benteke: better off at United or 'Pool?

Discussion in 'The Premier League' started by Hoddle is a god, Jul 17, 2015.

  1. We've had The Sun telling us that United are going to scupper the deal, and The Mirror telling us that he's definitely going to 'Pool. Until we see the player kissing the badge of his new club, we won't know for sure.

    Until that day, what club do you lads think would best suit him?

    You've seen what happens to strikers at 'Pool. Either they go stir-crazy (Balotelli), or they develop severe psychiatric problems (Suarez), or they turn into girls' blouses and spend all their time on the sick-table (Sturridge), or they become anonymous (Lambert and that other bloke).

    On first glance, therefore, the best advice for any striker thinking of going to 'Pool has got to be, "Don't do it, son!"

    However, things aren't necessarily that rosy at United. Sure, they love you to start with. Look at RVP, for example. The boy could do no wrong, when he first went there, but only a couple of seasons later and he can't get out of the place soon enough! And then you have to put up with the fact that Rooney's name will always be first on the team-sheet, no matter how **** he plays! Only a complete ****wit would put up with that kind of carry-on!

    So, on a casual glance, you've got to say that United isn't exactly an ideal place to go, if you are a striker who is serious about your football.

    It's a dilemma for Benteke. Neither option looks ideal. But what do you guys think he should do?

    PS: Please remember, lads, that this is a strictly "No-Wumming" zone, and your co-operation in that regard is greatly appreciated.
     
    #1
  2. chelsea - over 100 years of history

    chelsea - over 100 years of history Well-Known Member

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    He'll get more games at Liverpool I suspect as Sturridge is forever injured anyway.

    With United signing 87 midfielders I imagine they'll play 1 up top most weeks and that's likely to be Rooney. But he'll get a better chance to win things at United.

    As you say, tough choice. I'd probably say United.
     
    #2
  3. Chief

    Chief Northern Simpleton Forum Moderator

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    He's better off at Liverpool because quite frankly the sum being quoted is laughable and they're welcome to him.

    Plus, it will be funny to see them yet again blow incoming transfer funds on vastly inferior players like fat kids in a sweet shop.
     
    #3
    Null likes this.
  4. Also, it's going to be great hearing Carragher saying "Benteke" over and over again, in his gutteral Scouse accent.
     
    #4
  5. By the way, Chief, my 5 year old loves Adventure Time. When did you start watching it?
     
    #5
  6. chelsea - over 100 years of history

    chelsea - over 100 years of history Well-Known Member

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    To be fair, aren't most transfer fees ridiculous these days? It's not much more than than United paid for Shaw.
     
    #6

  7. If United can't afford Benteke, they might as well **** off right now regarding any chance of getting Kane!
     
    #7
  8. littleDinosaurLuke

    littleDinosaurLuke Well-Known Member

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    Liverpool undoubtedly.

    When the Yanks realise Brenda's pissed away another £100M+ for the second summer running, Utd can get him cheap in the fire sale.
     
    #8
  9. NSIS

    NSIS Well-Known Member

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    I couldn't give a toss!...
     
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  10. Thats not exactly advancing this debate, is it, NSS.

    I need hardly draw your attention to the wum-warning!
     
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  11. NSIS

    NSIS Well-Known Member

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    No, seriously, I couldn't give a toss! I feel a bit sorry for Benteke, being high jacked by Brenda, but then the poor sap doesn't realise what he's letting himself in for! Would he be any better off under the Dutch Robot? Who knows. Hence, I couldn't give a toss....:smile:
     
    #11
  12. UnitedinRed

    UnitedinRed Well-Known Member

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    Better off at Villa.
     
    #12
    Treble and Deleted 1 like this.
  13. HRH Custard VC

    HRH Custard VC National Car Park Attendant

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    UTD were never interested in him, its all paper talk
     
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  14. This is a hot potato debate that simply refuses to go away!
     
    #14
  15. HRH Custard VC

    HRH Custard VC National Car Park Attendant

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    I like cheese on my spud, can you do that?
     
    #15
    Treble likes this.
  16. Now you're talking! I love cheese and bacon on a jacket-potato, with a nice smattering of black pepper.
     
    #16
    HRH Custard VC likes this.
  17. Chief

    Chief Northern Simpleton Forum Moderator

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    I see no reason to compare it to ours and England's future left back for the next decade.

    It's a ridiculous sum for us to pay for a reserve striker who will no doubt want to play. He wouldn't get in ahead of Rooney.

    Nothing to do with not being able to afford him either. For a reserve striker willing to play second fiddle and wait for his chance we'd pay MORE for Kane. And could afford it if need be.
     
    #17
  18. Chief

    Chief Northern Simpleton Forum Moderator

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    I see no reason to compare it to ours and England's future left back for the next decade.

    It's a ridiculous sum for us to pay for a reserve striker who will no doubt want to play. He wouldn't get in ahead of Rooney.

    Nothing to do with not being able to afford him either. For a reserve striker willing to play second fiddle and wait for his chance we'd pay MORE for Kane. And could afford it if need be.
     
    #18
  19. Chief

    Chief Northern Simpleton Forum Moderator

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    I see no reason to compare it to ours and England's future left back for the next decade.

    It's a ridiculous sum for us to pay for a reserve striker who will no doubt want to play. He wouldn't get in ahead of Rooney.

    Nothing to do with not being able to afford him either. For a reserve striker willing to play second fiddle and wait for his chance we'd pay MORE for Kane. And could afford it if need be.
     
    #19
  20. Star of David Bardsley

    Star of David Bardsley 2023 Funniest Poster

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    Can't believe anyone will pay 32.5m for him when Austin is available for 15m. On his day when he can be arsed Benteke is great but massive potential to sulk and do **** all.
     
    #20

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