Article: Last season very much like not making love to a beautiful woman for Sunderland - Football, Sunderland AFC

So last season once again was ultimately promising but ended in disappointment as ever with SAFC it would seem.

So your getting ready for a big night out with the lads and theres an air of excitement just like there is at the start of any season. Youve got yourself all dolled up and you stroll past the mirror check yourself out and your looking pretty damn good (The last minute winner V City) its a promising start.

You hit the first bar have a few beers and have a bit of chit chat with a few ladies nothing comes of it but its still a promising evening (All the draws at the start of the season e.g Man Utd, Arsenal, Liverpool away)

Youre on your way to the next bar u stop at the burger van and get yourself some much needed fuel for the rest of the night. Shock horror your spill the whole thing all over yourself you think your night is ruined its a nightmare the world is gonna end the night is gonna be crap and your mates are ripping the piss out of you (The mag game) You get in the next bar you clean yourself up and youve got a little stain but nothing overly noticeable the world aint gonna end after all (Decent form after the mags game)

As you hit the next bar you see an absolute stunner you aint got a hope in hells chance but think ill go for it anyway. To your amazement shes actually interested and your getting on like a house on fire all thoughts of your cock up with the burger are gone you cant believe your luck (Chelsea away game) It continues youve got her in the palm of your hand nothings gonna stop you now your mates look on in amazement nobody can believe its happening (Good form through xmas and the new year and the thrill of a last gasp equaliser v the mags)

All of a sudden your getting in a taxi on your way back to her place this is gonna be the best night/season of your life. As your driving back you notice a couple of imperfections on her face (The sale of bent) but shes still better than anything you thought you might end the night with and you console yourself with that. (Signing sess and muntari) Your back at hers and its all getting steamy when you realise nothing is happening downstairs. You go to the bathroom to compose yourself and try again but still nothings going on Your devastated how could you throw away all your hard work like this (That horrible run) You accept your fate and leave tail between your legs and walk home in the rain (I felt this bad after the Fulham game to be honest)

You get home put yourself to bed when all of a sudden he wakes up its all to little to late but gives you a slight perk at the end of the night as you do the deed to yourself while imagining what could have been. (West Ham game and scraping top ten)

Ultimately you ended up right where you expected to with cock in hand in your own bed just as sunderland ended up where they expected to be 10th but you had one hell of a rollercoaster.

 

I like it.

Only thing I'd change is the erectile dysfunction. That's tantamount to relegation, a hefty fine and beginning in the championship with minus thirty points.

 

I guess its maybe a bit strong but it felt bloody bad at the time.

 

Love it, some imagination mind. Are you any good at filling in Tax forms?

 

Sure the taxman has his own erectile dysfunction to worry about welder!

 

that's fantastic! Should be on NewsNow!

 

Not bad for a Mag, eh, RednWhite!? Nice one.

 

Well thought out mate only thing i did different was
i married her and i have been married to those red and white stripes for over 45 years nearly had a divorce on a few occasions but realised i can't live without her. Had many a sex fueled night F.A cup 73 nearly a divorce Div 3.
We are still going strong and although she is expensive i take her away for the day every other week what do i get in return (im still figuring it out)

 

Lol where were u. Hopefully that episode is behind me.

Sorry welder im naff at lying on government forms didnt manage to bs my way into a student grant a few years back.

Anyone know who would have changed the title of the article. Not that im complaining it works better.

 

i see someone doesnt like my sense of humour with the 1 star lol.

 

It wasn't me, I never gave you any.

Don't like you at all you twat, never mind your sense of humour.

Sea you enn tea.