I have a beard, had it before they were trendy. mine is out of laziness - cba to shave everyday so would rather trim a beard once a week.
The big scruffy long ones should be kept for wizards and religious elders, not some rollie smoking vegan who sleeps on pallet furniture and has a vintage bike hanging on his living room wall.
You've just described hiag and piskie. Do you reckon they rub beard oil into each others facial hair?