Where they were on about that ship breaking records on the Tyne. Largest ship and cargo, delivering 75 tones of coal. Me old man nearly had a heart attack, "delivering f'ing coal the north east for a power station in Yorkshire, what a eff'ing disgrace". He is still livid about it now ranting on about Thatcher. Think there will be quite a few swear words directed at that piece of journalism.
I think when Thatcher eventually pops her cloggs, there will be an awful lot of people having a drink: and it won't be to mourn her passing!
HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD George Phillips, an elderly man, from Walled Lake, Michigan, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things. He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?" He said "No," but people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me. Then the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available" George said, "Okay." He hung up the phone and counted to 30. Then he phoned the police again. "Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I just shot and killed them both, the dogs are eating them right now." and he hung up. Within five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence. They caught the burglars red-handed. One of the Policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!" George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!" Don't mess with old people.
