Andy Carroll joke

Liverpool attempt to buy Andy Carroll for the price of ten Andy Carrolls

Liverpool have a had a bid turned down by Newcastle for Andy Carroll, believed to be the equivalent of ten Andy Carrolls, with Newcastle reportedly holding out for a price more in the region of twelve Andy Carrolls.

Newcastle manager Alan Pardew has insisted that Carroll is not for sale, but it is believed that owner Mike Ashley’s head may be turned if Liverpool up their offer by a further two Andy Carrolls.

A club source revealed, “Every player has their price, and in Andy Carroll’s case it would be about twelve times what he’s actually worth.”

The cost of English players in today’s market has caused concern to clubs looking to pay realistic prices for players, with one pundit insisting “We’ve already seen Darren Bent sold for the price of four Darren Bents, with the possibility of that rising to five Darren Bents depending on performance and appearances.”

“So I suppose you could say that in this climate one Andy Carroll probably is worth about ten Andy Carrolls.”

Andy Carroll Liverpool bid
Liverpool fans have expressed concerns at the proposed transfer fee, but a club spokesperson revealed that they were confident that the Newcastle forward would start to repay the fee straight away.

A statement read, “We hope there isn’t too much early expectation from the fans, after all, despite us paying anywhere up to twelve Andy Carrolls, he’s still just one Andy Carroll.”

“On the bright side, any contract we sign will see us fine Andy a months wages every time he gets into any sort of trouble, so hopefully he should pay back most of his transfer fee over the first couple of seasons.”

 

that's meant to be a joke?

err, which is the funny bit? could you point it out for us that are slow on the uptake?

did not raise even the merest smile let alone a laugh

 

it was the sentance at the very bottom that made me laugh

 

Interesting concept.

To extrapolate your theory: Sunday proved no Andy Carrolls is greater that one Torres + one Drogba + one Anelka, which would make at least one of them a negative. As Anelka equals £10m (£40m + Anelka = £50m) it must be Drogba or Torres.

We can also derive that no Andy Carrolls is equal to all of Arsenal.