When your old lady is on the blob, has the painters in, pissing red etc. does she offer you an alternative? For example Horatio or the Council Gritter? Or do you have to wait a week for things to get back to normal? I've got millions of volunteers ready and waiting and at my stage of life I don't want to waste them in the sin of Onan so looks like I have to wait until the refurbishment works have finished.