A kick in the teeth to spur us on!

I know we’re all very disappointed at the way everything has panned out and we’re now facing the bleak situation where Leon Best and Shola Ameobi make up our front line. It’s not desirable, it’s not the greatest of situations to find ourselves in but we’re seemingly stuck with this attacking force for the remainder of the season. If it doesn't inspire fear in defences; perhaps we can utilise the comedy aspect?

We’re still confused as to how Carroll left given that he’d been in the press stating his desire to stay but then handed in a transfer request. To get clarity on how these developments altered we’ll have to wait and even then we’ll have to take both sides of the story with pinches of salt.

We want to know how Pardew could have been so adamant that Carroll wasn’t going anywhere, to watching him leave and still remaining in his position as manager if it turns out that Andy was forced out the door. Did he have assurances from the board that Carroll was off limits? As above; it’s a situation that could become clearer in time once the furore has died down and the autobiographies are released.

I for one can’t wait for Pardew: Portrait of a Patsy.

We move on again as we’ve been doing for a hell of a long time. This getting kicked in the nuts malarkey seems to get easier to deal with every time and if we look behind us we’ll see hundreds of bridges that we’ve crossed and just think of all the water that has gone under them. Solace? Perhaps a bit. We’re all dab hands at dealing with disappointment now.

I’d just like to remind you about the media expected supporter vitriol and how we can deal with it this time.

The media is expecting an upsurge in emotion as we can’t have a hullabaloo without a protest of sorts!

We’re all aware that last time there was a certain lack of planning and some of the crowd looked a tad foolish. That won’t happen this time though as I’ve been working on a plan and I feel fairly certain that if it’s executed properly we’ll make more of a media impact for the right reasons.

First of all, we will have spell checkers located throughout the city centre who are there to assist with any of your bed linen broadcasts. There will be no unofficially unchecked bed sheets allowed within a certain radius of St James Park on the day of the protests. The spell check is free so why not use it.

We’re trying to look professional here people.

We also need to maintain the same chant so I don’t want you all to go off shouting random exhortations about the board or the manager.

Let’s keep it simple yet also democratically elected to show the world that we are united and fair minded. Please select one of the following and vote accordingly using the UN tried and tested method of selecting the corresponding star:

1) Pardew out!!
2) Sack the board!!
3) Boycott!!
4) We want the Messiah!!
5) Cockney mafia out!!

There will be no drinking of the David Craig supplied White Lightning outside of the stadium in front of his camera crew. This caused many issues last time and has often been used as de facto stereotypes for all NUFC fans when seen on certain video sharing web sites.

Let’s all work together this time and with unity; perhaps comes a new owner.

Cheers.

 

Nothing short of doing all 5 will do.

 

I want to find out whether he jumped or if he was pushed before I start blaming Pardew or Cashley